1. living without darkness? Do you mean the darkness of emotions like hate and jealousy and envy? You are correct - you would not recognise yourself without these things. I am not sure what this has got to do with heaven though or why it then becomes like Hell?
Yes i am talking about my hate, fear, jealousy, manipulation, anger, etc. It becomes hell if those emotions are taken away from me. I don't want them erased or gone. They make me who i am. And, i like using them against others sometimes.
2. undying and eternal. I discussed this briefly above. I think humans have no idea what eternality is like and every attempt to make it about undying and immortality is unhelpful. I agree that I don't understand what it is like - but neither do you. you seem confused - how can knowing there is anything after death give you hope and yet the idea of no off switch scare you? I think that life - if that is the correct term in heaven is unlike anything we understand here. It is not a matter of an off switch - because that is a mortal term. Death is an unwelcome intrusion into our life. It does not make life beautiful.
How do you know what i can and cannot imagine? I very well can imagine it, i've experienced it, and it is my worst nightmare to be eternal. You are saying a lot of things "you" are either afraid of or don't find torturous. And never said heaven is hell for you... obviously it's not. But yes, i think death makes this life beautiful. Without death we wouldn't know true anything. You may learn love sure, but love is taken to another level when you know you can loss it. Death is the most beautiful creation any higher intelligence could create. Here, let me paint a little analogy for you so you can see how i imagine it bc maybe you truly can't imagine it... I'll do the more extreme version but if you get it you can imagine the others too. Say you watch a movie and this movie is the best movie you've ever seen. Now, imagine i told you... you are not allowed to watch any other movie. Furthermore, i tell you this is the only entertainment you are allowed for the rest of your life. After how many times of watching that movie would it turn to hell? Now lets say it doesn't even have to be your only entertainment which is the most extreme version. Let's say you can have other entertainment but the only movie you are allowed to watch is this movie. You can't watch any other movie. How many times can you watch it... sure you might say you'll watch it once every year so you can still enjoy it, but times infinity into that... at what point would the movie become hell for you? That's what death is, turning that movie off and putting in a damn new show. It's beautiful and i'm sad you can't see it.
3. so you want no restrictions? and you would become bored, is that it? Jesus indicated that there wont be marriage in heaven anyway - so infidelity is not an issue. You seem to have a warped idea of heaven - it is not just an extension of earth.
So am i allowed to hook up with different chicks in heaven or not? If i can, then we can take this off the list. And, what i know of heaven is what Christian priests throughout the years have told me. But who knows, i might like your version. And you better believe i'm comparing it to things i love. Bc those are things i have fallen in love with bc of life.
4. How do you know everyone is nice? And what is wrong with sunday worship? For me it is the highlight of my week. Yet, I don't think the bible gives us that kind of description anyway. there is going to be a lot of things to keep on doing. Variety and creativity will be unbounded - and yet Heaven is not going to be an entertainment cruise ship - or a retirement home. IT is not Disney land.
Again i don't care what you like or don't like. This is about "me." You are asking me to consider worshiping something for the rest of my life. I have to make sure... i'm not worshiping going to hell. You can go to heaven for all i care... I just know that isn't the only place. Sunday worship is boring and burdensome... i get nothing positive from it. I would rather listen to a radio preacher if anything. Also, i'm not talking about it being a theme park. Just normal everyday what it is... sounds torturous. Lastly, so you are saying not everyone is nice? I.e. can i troll people, can i manipulate people, can i hate people, can i just dislike some people, etc. in heaven? If you say yes, i will also reconsider taking that off my torture list.
5. it seems that you misunderstand the bible. and I guess that is not surprising. I agree that if you want those things - then heaven really would be Hell for you. Heaven is all about God - it is not about you. Yet, the alternatives are not going to give you those things either. Hell wont. So not only do you not get the things you desire - but you get tortured forever as well. And if there is no god - then you get death - an endless dismal darkness - with no escape - nothingness - no one remembering you. So, I find your comment about an after life - confusing as well as dismal.
What does heaven being about god have anything to do with the implications that will effect me? Bc it's me that will have to live it... unless i become god which is a different story and more on the lines of logical spiritual platform. And... you know the only other alternatives how? So again, what you are asking me to believe is hell all around. I hear you, and i hear what afterlife beliefs your telling me, none of them is "paradise" to me. So where does that leave me? Well, guess what... there are other spiritual beliefs that fix this paradox. So why in the world wouldn't i believe something that gives me paradise but live for something that will give me hell? All i'm saying is... that is a paradox for your heaven idea which is one of many reasons religion is so clearly man-made. Humans are fallible and especially humans thousands of years ago wouldn't have even considered paradise, as you describe it, being anything but paradise for them.