Quasi Dungeons and Dragons

Author: drafterman

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#2191
Buddamoose
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(lol, do you really expect it to be that easy? And would holy water even save the boy?)

(Yes, that's how you get powdered metals in RL. RL = real life. That and chemistry using I think some sort of nitrate solution. 

No, holy water wouldn't save him. Holy water damages vamps and prevents them from regenerating during their thrn in combat. Vamps regenerate unless you hit em with Radiant and/or holy water.)



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#2192
drafterman
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@TheDredPriateRoberts
(Only one way to find out)
#2193
Buddamoose
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Upon seeing the old woman I yell out

Hallooooooo! Old Maggie! Can we speak with you a moment?

(Nobody eat the pies she has yet just to be on the safe side)
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#2194
drafterman
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The old woman gives a sudden start and clutches at her chest. She looks around for the source of the noise and then smiles broadly with a single-toothed grin at the group.

Deer lordy, you gave me such a scare young boy. Shouldn't go about frightening old ladies.

She wheels her squeeky cart up to the group and gives Snerp's cheeks a firm pinch.

What can I do for you strangers?

Her voice is high pitched and wheezy, whistling slightly through her single tooth as she talks.
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#2195
drafterman
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#2196
TheDredPriateRoberts
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@drafterman
We are new to the area perhaps we could ask you for some information.  (nudge Snerp, give a couple of coins)
(topics for discussion/questioning, windmill, church, the castle, village to the west, priest, Ismark, whatever else you guys can think of)
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#2197
drafterman
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Oh.. it's getting late, deary. I gotta head back home. Don't want to be in the woods when it gets too dark, you know. How about this, I have a few pastries left over, I'll sell them to you for a discount, and next time I'm in town we can chat all you want? Hm?
#2198
Buddamoose
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@drafterman
How about we escort you back to your house so you aren't all alone and we can talk as we walk? Maybe even have some pastries? Group like us, especially with tall, burly, and scaly over there.

I point at Grahf

 Guaranteed nobody messes with you and your pastries that have naught but rave reviews with us in tow. I can play some music to walk to as well if that interests you. 

Pulling out my lute I begin strumming a soft melody

(Again, don't eat the pastry. If she tries say ur not hungry. I'll pantomine eating one to fool her cause I have +4 to sleight-of-hand. I think she wants us to eat the pastries so we are easily lied to or it has some spell effect that otherwise might charm us.)


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#2199
drafterman
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That's very kind of you sonny, but I've managed my route for years. I think I'll be fine. Perhaps I'll see you around!

She begins wheeling her cart away.
#2200
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@drafterman
That's very kind of you sonny, but I've managed my route for years. I think I'll be fine. Perhaps I'll see you around!

I'm afraid I must insist. You yourself said it's dangerous at night after all. 

I begin following her still playing music. 

So how long have you lived in the windmill outside of town? 
#2201
TheDredPriateRoberts
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@Buddamoose
(someone could use detect and identify on the pastries.......we can buy them and investigate them at the manor)
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#2202
drafterman
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She pauses and frowns. I'm tired and have been chatting with people all day. I'll come back tomorrow.

She resumes walking, a bit faster. From the lower section of the cart, you hear something thumping. 
#2203
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@drafterman
She resumes walking, a bit faster. From the lower section of the cart, you hear something thumping. 

Lady what's the thumping? Should only have pastries in there no? You wanna stop or are we gonna have to stop you ourselves? 
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#2204
drafterman
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She stares daggers at Snerp and hisses, then begins running - faster than you would expect for ol' Betty White - pushing the cart in front of her.
#2205
TheDredPriateRoberts
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@Buddamoose
(some chase music if you will)
#2206
Buddamoose
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I dash after her. When I catch up I immediately cast Thunderwave to upend the cart. Then somersalt backwards back out of range drawing my bow and aiming ready to dodge should she attack.

What did I just tell you!? Now either you can stop this nonsense, or fight. You are outmatched 5 to 1. Consider the choice carefully.

What in the name of some Soylent Green BS is going on here? Somebody check the cart and make sure whoever or whatever is in there is safe.

The nocked arrow remains leveled at her head. 

 

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#2207
drafterman
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A thunderous boom echos throughout the streets of the town. The cart flips over and goes skidding 10 feet away. Left over pastries are scattered and strewn about the road. From the bottom of the cart falls out a small burlap sack. It is not moving.

The old woman also goes flying. She lands on the ground with a thud. She leans up on her arms and begins dragging herself by her arms down the road. What did you do?! Help! Murderers! Help!

Player Summaries:
Eikka -  24/24HP - 16 AC - Channel Divinity: ⬤ | Relentless Endurance: ⭘ | Spell Slots: 1|1
✶Grahf - 20/28 HP - 16 AC - Breath Weapon: ⬤ | Divine Sense: 3  | Channel Divinity: ⬤ | Lay on Hands: 5 | Spell Slots: 1
Luraxt - 13/17 HP - 13 AC - Arcane Recovery ⬤ | Spell Secrets ⬤ | Spell Slots: 4|2
Roberts -  28/28 HP - 19 AC - Action Surge: ⬤  | Second Wind ⬤ | Spell Slots: 2
✶Snerp - 18/18 HP - 13 AC - Bardic Inspiration: ⬤⭘ | Spell Slots: 0|2

#2208
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The old woman also goes flying. She lands on the ground with a thud. She leans up on her arms and begins dragging herself by her arms down the road. What did you do?! Help! Murderers! Help

I keep my bow drawn and arrow aimed at her head.

What were you hiding? You making these pies out of people Maggie? What are we gonna find in the windmill, cause you know we are going to check considering we hold the property deed.

#2209
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@drafterman
(I'm also keeping a wary eye out for anyone approaching. If they should start coming to investigate, I have something else up my sleeve, so please notify of townsfolk approaching while they are still in the distance.)
#2210
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@secularmerlin
From the bottom of the cart falls out a small burlap sack. It is not moving

(check the sack and heal whatever is in there. I think it's a kid tbh. They should be at worst in the process of dying and still healable. Though my guess is they were knocked unconscious. This is some Soylent Green/Hansel and Gretel shit it seems.)

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#2211
drafterman
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(Let's see how the others respond to this... development)
#2212
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@drafterman
(basically I'm gonna use unearthly chorus if a crowd starts to show up. Seems exactly the kind of situation Unearthly Chorus is made for.)
#2213
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@drafterman
(I'll submit that officially actually.)

If a crowd starts to show up I pull out my lute and channel and focus Unearthly Chorus. Music echoing through the town as I relay the events that lead up to where we currently sit. Attempting to charm those who come up via the chorus.

(While rolling with advantage on persuading people of the truth of the events as they transpired?)

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#2214
drafterman
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@Buddamoose
(While rolling with advantage on persuading people of the truth of the events as they transpired?)
(For those successfully charmed by the spell, yes.)


#2215
Buddamoose
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@drafterman
(ok cool, so no charm it's +6, with charm it's +6 and advantage)

(I'm stoked there's a situation where Unearthly Chorus might actually come in handy 😂. It sounded so dope and then when you said it's not really a combat spell i I was like, "oh shit, I might have screwed up picking it on the reroll 😂.)
#2216
TheDredPriateRoberts
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@drafterman
(I'll check the bag)
#2217
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@TheDredPriateRoberts
(I'll check the bag)

(We should be able to heal whatever is in the bag. Hasn't been that long and there's should be a window(like we have) to cure someone while they're dying and otherwise revive them.)

(Btw, was i I just a badass mofo or what? 👏👏💯. Snerp pulling out all the stops. 😂)

#2218
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@Buddamoose
(I was going to do something to the wheels of the cart or push it from the front to slow it down......less dangerous and destructive that way, if the villagers come and can't be "persuaded" I will throw you under the bus, since you'd fit under it so easily lol )
#2219
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Oh dear. I guess I watch for any odd characters around
#2220
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@TheDredPriateRoberts
less dangerous and destructive that way

(Pfffft, still got the job done 😏)