Instigator / Pro
RationalMadman's avatar
4
RationalMadman
1702
rating
574
debates
67.86%
won
Topic
#5268

It is usually better to have a kettle and a dildo than to have a frying pan and a school book.

Status
Finished

The debate is finished. The distribution of the voting points and the winner are presented below.

Winner & statistics
Better arguments
0
3
Better sources
2
2
Better legibility
1
1
Better conduct
1
1

After 1 vote and with 3 points ahead, the winner is...

Benjamin
Tags
Puzzle
RM
Funny
school
dildo
Parameters
Publication date
Last updated date
Type
Rated
Number of rounds
3
Time for argument
Two days
Max argument characters
7,000
Voting period
Two weeks
Point system
Multiple criterions
Voting system
Open
Minimal rating
1,500
Contender / Con
Benjamin's avatar
7
Benjamin
1774
rating
98
debates
77.55%
won
Description

This is not a troll debate, understand that the votes will be held to voting moderation, it's a funny debate concept but the debate is 100% serious.

Round 1
RationalMadman's avatar
RationalMadman
Pro
#1
Disclaimer: IF YOU DO NOT KNOW WHAT A DILDO IS AND ARE NOT MATURE ENOUGH TO HAVE A CLUE, CLOSE THIS DEBATE NOW!

===

I ask that you observe daily life and all the scenarios that can and will arise at varying frequencies and probabilities.

· Boiling
Boiling is a very simple method of water disinfection. Heating water to a high temperature, 100°C, kills most of the pathogenic organisms, particularly viruses and bacteria causing waterborne diseases. In order for boiling to be most effective, the water must boil for at least 20 minutes. Since boiling requires a source of heat, rudimentary or non-conventional methods of heat generation may be needed in areas where electricity or fossil fuels are not available.

I can imagine so many situations where boiled water can benefit you, not just making tea and coffee. Kettles require electricity but can also be heated by gas stove. This means whether your house bill situation favours electricity or gas, you can opt either way. You cannot fry a pan with electricity... At least not unless you're some super fantastic scientist with gadgets to work it around.

With boiling water, you don't need cleaning products much, if all you have in your house is a kettle and a dildo, you can even disinfect the dildo after every single use, no matter what noble cause you used it for!

The frying pan will probably evaporate water or not only that, be very dangerous to handle. Even if you find the exact heat and technique to not evaporate the water, are you going to run around with a frying pan to disinfect everything? Tell me if your life depends on it would you rather use kettle water and combine it with everything else or a frying pan's water?

You can even combine the hot water in a kettle with cold to make a beautiful warm cost-effective shower! That's that shit they don't teach you in high school.

Speaking of school what exactly is the book useful for? One subject? One grade? That's about it. You've got a lump of paper and cardboard that harms the environment for a thing that can be achieved better with online resources.


The average high schooler carries a backpack with about 16 to 20 pounds of textbooks in it, according to a 2004 study by the California Board of Education. The backpack weight peaks in 11th grade, when students carry an overall book weight of 20 pounds, 12.7 ounces. This is about 15.4 percent of the average male weight and about 17.6 percent of the average female weight for that grade.

The surplus weight of the textbooks not only acts as a physical representation of the stress of the work students have to do during the year, but the use of heavy physical textbooks can lead to health problems like chronic back pain, can increase our environmental impact as a school, and can cost more than digital textbooks.

Carrying this much weight every day can bring detrimental health effects. In an interview with the American Chiropractic Association about backpack health and safety, Dr. Scott Bautch said, “In my own practice, I have noticed a marked increase in the number of young children who are complaining about back, neck, and shoulder pain. The first thing I ask these patients is, ‘Do you carry a backpack to school?’ Almost always the answer is ‘yes.’” His findings were not singular. In a study by the Archives of Disease in Childhood in 2012, 61.4 percent of children analyzed had backpacks that were as heavy as 10 percent of their body weight. These children experienced a 50 percent higher risk of back pain and a 42 percent increase in the risk of back pathology. Many students have already been treated for injuries involving backpacks. According to a report by the U.S Consumer Product Safety Commission, at least 14,000 students are treated for backpack-related injuries each year.

A dildo and kettle can't be replaced by anything other than themselves to be as good and versatile at what exactly they do, especially not somethig that weighs less and harms the environment less in how it's made (you can replace a dildo with a more environmentally friendly dildo but that's still a dildo, don't tell me you want to waste a bunch of cucumbers over that, it can even rot).

I ask to you this, reader;

If I am a robber in your house and you have 20 seconds to save your family from being beaten up, abused, robbed, hurt or anything along those lines, you have a kettle that can evenbe used itself to both shield and hurt and project-throw boiling water with a precision a frying pan only equals in defense and that's if you're strong enough to swing it right again and again... then you hav ethe dildo, you can poke the robber int he eye, hold off a knife cushion a bullet even as you run at him/her. This is no joke, I am telling you what is more useful. Answer me.

A frying pan is not a pot it does not have the lid that becomes a convenient shield. If you grab a frying pan, the attacker will also be ready for the obvious shielding or swinging move, you have power but not speed. With a kettle, with water inside it, the robber has no fucking clue how you'll come at him/her/'them'.

This is not a drill, this is real life, real scenario.

Let's say you bring home your spouse or friend over and are broke as hell. You have a kettle and a dildo, do you know how much you can do with that both in terms of drinks, food and intimacy? Much more than a frying pan and 1 school book. Even if you're studying what good is 1 school book as all you have?

Now, let's say you drop something down the toilet, a ring, dildo can get it and if not the spout of the kettle combined with it can pincer it.

Preservation of Nutrients: Boiling foods in water helps retain their nutritional value, as water-soluble vitamins remain in the cooking liquid.
Lower Caloric Content: Boiled foods generally have lower calorie content compared to their fried counterparts, making them a healthier option for weight management.

If you are a broke parent and want to make food for your children just pour kettle water to boil. or even just use the kettle itself to boil food.

Frying pan is unhealthy, don't be a calorie whore.
Benjamin's avatar
Benjamin
Con
#2
Thank you, RationalMadman.

Framework:
PRO has the sole Burden of Proof. He has to prove that his two items are better to have in most cases than my two items. I win even if they two sets of items are equally good.


Kettle:
I don’t think you can use a kettle to cook food. At best you might be able to boil 2-3 eggs in there. To boil something as simple as potatoes you need to keep them submerged in boiling water for many minutes, you can't just pour boiling water past them. PRO also says that kettles can be used to craft a makeshift shower, but I would strongly advise against trying that unless you want to incur the risk of third degree burns just for a 2 second shower. Boiling water is not necessary in many countries because the tap water is safe. If you are very poor and live in a village where you don’t even have safe drinking water you are probably not going to have much free time to use the dildo and you definitely can’t spare the precious energy and water to clean it afterwards. The same applies for home invasion. It is obviously not viable to turn your kettle on after the intruders have already entered, and you must have incredible luck for them to arrive during the 20 minute window that the kettle is being used. But even if you have it ready with steaming water it is heavy and clumsy due to the weight of the water. You may burn one of the intruders if you are lucky but afterwards they will definitely take revenge by killing you or at least give you 3rd degree burns as well. It’s even possible that in your attempt to be unpredictable in your fight witht the intruders that you make a mistake and pour the boiling water on yourself. 


Frying pan
I agree with PRO that frying pans have excellent striking power. We have video evidence that an old man with just a frying pan can defeat a crocodile with ease. But PRO makes the assertion that you cannot swing a frying pan with sufficient speed and that your opponent will be able to dodge your attacks which is not substantiated. Serious street fighters and weapons experts have done extensive testing and found the frying pan to be excellent weapons with both speed and power. In fact, the frying pan is orders of magnitude better for home defense than the kettle. You will be able to run with it, block knife strikes with it and knock people out. So unless the intruders show up in full plate armor wielding a battle axe, the frying pan will give you a decent chance of defeating them in melee combat. To run AT a gunner with a dildo as shield like PRO described sounds very implausible. But if they do aim a gun at you the frying pan can definitely protect your head while you run to cover. You could even go full Captain America and throw it in their face and knock them out. The pan is always available, way more reliable and versatile and requires no prep-time unlike the kettle. 

Uncooked meat is incredibly dangerous to consume, way more so than unboiled water. So unless you are a vegetarian, the frying pan is the superior option to increase your chances of survival. Just drink moderately clean water from a river, plastic container or the sink. Plus, most frying pans come with a lid, so you can actually boil water fairly well with a frying pan. Moreover, you can place the frying pan outside when it rains to collect safe rainwater. The opposite is not true, you cannot prepare meals in a kettle. The frying pan is way more durable and will last much longer than the kettle. In many countries you can just put the frying pan out in the sun and it will heat up to the necesary temperature for free. You can also use it as a hammer. 


Dildo:
PRO says that you can pincer a ring in the toilet with his two items but I find that highly implausible and would suggest just using your hands and washing them afterwards. The same goes for poking the eyes of an intruder with the dildo, at that point just use a random rock or tree branch, which are both free and more effective. So really all the dildo can do for you is its intended purpose. But about 50% of the population are straight males and lesbians. So immediately 50% of the population don’t want it. Then we subtract the children, asexuals and elderly who also don’t want to use a dildo. Then we must also consider those who are religiously motivated to abstain from using a dildo, or who never have time for it, or who are sufficiently satisfied by their partners often enough. In many countries like Saudi Arabia, dildoes are illegal or taboo, and females are constantly under supervision by their husbands, brothers or even their own sons -- so for them it is far to dangerous. So the vast majority of people will never be able to get any utility from the dildo. PRO says that dildos cannot be replaced by anything, but that is false. I would argue that a sexual partner is way better than a dildo, or if you don’t have one you could use your fingers. Billions of people have lived and died without ever touching a dildo and they had no problems. So PRO really only has one item that is actually useful. 





School book:
PRO mentions some drawbacks of excessive backpack weights. But if you have a school book, it means you are currently getting educated or have already become educated. That means you are going to earn more money which allows you to attract more desirable sexual partners and buy higher quality dildos and even a good kettle as well. Back pain aside, education is one of the major predictors of quality of life, and has numerous incredible benefits: “Americans with a college education report they are happier, healthier and enjoying a higher quality of life than respondents with a high school education or less”. The potential harms of book-based education are more than made up for by its benefits. Even if we assume that you are not educated, and just randomly have a school book, it ist still very useful because you can sell the book. School books in university and college are generally highly valuable. And they can be resold easily for a good price, especially if you have taken good care of it. With that money you can buy both a kettle and a dildo with cash left to spare. But in the vast majority of cases, people with school books will be educated, which makes them more attractive as partners and employees. So after selling the book you are now educated and have a frying pan, kettle and dildo and some extra funds. Way better than being broke and surviving purely on coffee. 


Conclusion:
The dildo is useless for most humans. The kettle is actually very usefull, but the frying pan and school book are even more usefull and better to have. So the resolution fails. 


Round 2
RationalMadman's avatar
RationalMadman
Pro
#3
Scope Issue

The debate's scope is 1 of each object, my opponent is violating not only this but even the 'usually' part in multiple ways.
Usual:
normal; happening, done, or used most often

Better:
more advantageous or effective

The usual person has no martial arts training:

... around 1.6% of the Australian population took part in a combat sport in the previous 12 months. (Source: see page 39 of the report on sports injuries: Page on aihw.gov.au)That ties in with a number of around 1% for UK adult participation from the General Household Survey.

Sure, I reckon Asian countries have a higher percentage but we are talking training through to adulthood. Which leads me into the next point... Age.

My opponents' debate starts mixing around an old man fighting a crocodile with some schoolchildren. Does 1 school book in the hand of a 20 year old who is out of school matter anymore?

A dildo makes a great throwing toy for a child and is a good sexual education tool so you can't just rule out any age group from that. It's actually a great way to convince a teenage girl to not go around getting pregnant.

Still, in 2019, 38.4 percent of all high school students reported that they had ever had sexual intercourse. Adolescent sex can result in pregnancy or sexually transmitted infections (STIs) that affect young people’s overall and reproductive health. Adolescents ages 15-24 account for nearly half of the 20 million new cases of STIs, also called sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), each year.2 No STI is harmless, and many can cause infertility and even death if left untreated.2

Scope alone wins me the debate on so many fronts if you start to grasp it.

I am telling you, whether you're afflicted with micropenis and can't please you're woman or you're a big bad schlong wielder and want it in your own butt, even if you want to practise juggling or use it as a throwand fetch toy for your pet dog, there's nothing as heartwarming for the mother of the household and all others in it too as the dildo. Unlike a vibrator, the dildo doesn't even give here this sensation you can't compete with, it sits there, doing its job while you work your ass off and come home too tired to fuck. If you're sick with the flu and don't want her to catch it and don't want her banging your bully neighbour with the ripped bod, look no further than the household dildo.

It keeps families together, marriages secure and you know what?

Please let me quote this fine lady:
I did notice there were more reviews about dildos than reviews about vibrators in my recent readings of sex toy reviews. There were many woman that commented they would rather buy a dildo for personal sexual use as it reminds them of a said partner, others stated it helps with the fantasies they have of another person.

Since dildos also come in vibrating versions, those women who respectfully love vibration sexual therapy should try a vibrating dildo or squirting dildo for a more realistic personal pleasure approach.

You can get really kinky with dildos too. Most are equipped with a suction cup base which can be safely placed on a flat surface such as furniture, walls, and tables.
Another great reason to choose a dildo is that they are mostly strap-on harness compatible and are versatile in a women-on-women session or male-on-female sessions for double penetration or E.D. aide.

There are also dildos which you can purchase from an Adult Toy Store like Cupid Boutique that effectively help you with pegging your male partner. These strap-on harness kits come with a perfect sized dildo which will provide the utmost in pegging pleasure. So with so many reasons to use a dildo, it is not surprising that the amount of woman or men who admit they use dildos is increasing by the years.

that's right there's not even a true dilemma! VIBRATING DILDOS EXIST, BET YOU DIDN'T KNOW THAT!

So the question is this.

Whether you're in a sexless marriage trying to keep the household happy and together or you're in a household invasion fending off the invader, what does the 98% person do? Swing a frying pan around like a ninja? They pour hot boiling water or try to knock the other out with ease.

In fact, for weight lifting, a kettle lets you fill varying millilitres of water (1ml is 1 gram) to experiment with different weights, you can literally use it as a strengthening aid along your journey if you're into martial arts.

Furthermore, in general your house isn't being invaded, least of all by a crocodile. Let's be realistic.

My opponent says oh no we need things to help us store and cook with boiling water. Sure, yes, we can drink tap water too (who said to drink boiling water instead? Not me...) but do you know the catch?

With everything you do with a kettle, either the utensil to assist itself is extremely resuable and easy to clean (pot, mug etc) or the kettle itself is, in fact you can just let it collect calcification if you don't care. Dildos need rinsing, which the kettle can help with disinfecting with ease due to the hot water. On the other hand, frying pans are nightmares to clean, they spit a lot of oil while frying, requiring you to get a splatter screen that itsel fisn't easy to clean, let alone if you don't have one, they themselves arent easy to clean as water doesnt mix with oil and the utensils you need are often expensive if very resuable or cheap and get done in after a couple burns or drops.

Either you have a big frying pan, which is ridiculous to swing around in general and is cumbersome but cooks a lot or you have a small one, which lets you cook far less.

The school book will always be relevant to only one subject, one syllabus for one full grade (AKA academic year). That's just not worth it. In general the value and versatility of that is ridiculous. Kettles and dildos last lifetimes.

Frying pans? You better have spent  a lot and take good care, don't you dare scratch that teflon coating:
Not all non stick pans are created equal, so they can range in length of life. While most non stick pans last an average of two to three years, pans of a poorer quality may yield fewer uses before the non stick coating wears off. Alternately, higher quality pans may last longer than three years with the right care.
Proper care and maintenance, storage, and cleaning will elongate the lifespan of your non stick pans. When purchasing a new pan, read the accompanying user’s guide for important information like whether the pan is oven safe and what temperature it can safely reach.

The debate is meant to be about humans as a whole, the usual humans are only a minority schoolchildren and for only some of them will any one specific school book matter. Please consider this. My opponent is totally changing scope, don't lose sight of what matters, family unity with a satisfied wife, pegged husband and lovely tea/coffee.
Benjamin's avatar
Benjamin
Con
#4
Scope
PRO claims that I have violated the scope of the debate without substantiation. I have only discussed the four items and their utility for different people.

Frying pan
PRO gives us a false dichotomy that the frying pan must be either useless for cooking or useless for self defense based on what size it has. That is patently false. The man in the video was able to swing a very large frying pan at the crocodile with great speed and power. And this man was an old geezer with terrible technique who only used one hand. Anyone between the ages 18 and 80 will be able to swing the frying pan fairly quickly and with great striking power, no martial arts expertise needed.

PRO argues that a crocodile is not a common threat. Try telling that to the 1000 people killed by crocodiles each year. Plus, PRO is missing the point even if his assertion was correct. The point is that PRO was lying about the effectiveness of frying pan for self-defense, and wrongfully asserting that the kettle was better, which I clearly demonstrated to be false. "Skin-crawling videos of writhing rodent masses have been shared around the world along with reports of patients bitten in hospital, destroyed machinery and swarms running across roads en masse." [france24]. What, you think you can beat back a horde of rodents with some hot water. Think again. What if there is a giant spider in your house in australia? Or a snake? Maybe even a street dog or cheetah which is very common in India. When that happens to your family you are going to wish that you had a sturdy frying pan.

Food
You can prepare almost any food using a frying pan, and there are multiple ways to cook with it [wikihow]. Here are 45 especially delicious recipies that you can make in a frying pan. 

Cleaning
Frying pans are very easy and cheap to clean. You literally just brush them with some soap after using them. If this is to complicated for you I doubt you will be able to use a dildo.

Longevity
PRO fails to realize why no-stick frying pans are so popular. Because the benefits of easy and more convenient cooking far outweights the shorter life span.


School book
PRO argues that the school book loses utility after you have finished your education. Even if that was true, to have already received an education is obviously better. It will increase your quality of life, your pay rates, your social status and happiness. PRO is siginificantly undercutting the school book by totally ignoring the value of education. Furthermore, PRO's premise is wrong. Even after you are finished with school the book retains its utility in the form of monetary value that will never be significantly diminished. There will always be new students looking to buy school books slighty cheaper than the newly printed ones. A college textbook costs on average 105$, and you will be able to sell it for at least half the price in most cases. You can then browse a variety of kettles on Amazon. Some are as cheap as 12$, so you can also add a dildo and a kitchen knife into the cart and pay for shipping as well. PRO ignores this argument but that is a tactical blunder of astronomical proportions, because there is no way kettle+dildo is better than kettle+dildo+frying pan+kitchen knife+cash+expanded job opportunities. PRO has to deal with this argument.


Kettle
I reiterate that during 95% of the day your kettle will be turned off and won't be ready with boiling water for home defense. I also extend that with a kettle you won't be able to make decent meals, and you will definately have to live as a vegeterian since you cannot cook meat in a kettle. When it comes to clean water most people will just drink tap water. But the frying pan will also allow you to boil water even if that is not its specialty. PRO says that drinks for a date are very usefull but who in their right minds would want to use a dildo while drinking coffee or tea. No, what you are going to want is a casket of nice beer and a steak, which requires you to have a frying pan and the money from high-paying jobs which are unlocked by the education that your book implies you have. 

Cleaning
PRO asserts that you don't realy need to put in effort to maintain the kettle but that is flat out wrong wrong. Unless you clean it regularly it will get nasty and inefficient.
Water contains minerals and as it boils, some of those minerals get left behind and fall to the bottom of the kettle. This is particularly problematic if you live in an area with hard water—meaning there are lots of minerals in your water. Over time, these scales, also called “furring,” will gunk up the heating element and cause your kettle to be inefficient. [countryliving]
To clean a kettle is way harder than a frying pan. You'll need an acidic compound. For example, one method requires you to have distilled white vinegar, mixing it evenly with water, boil it for 20 minutes, then rinsing the kettle and even then there will still be scales and gunk inside the kettle that you will need a special sponge to remove [ibid]. 

Weightlifting
Using a kettle for weightlifting is incredibly impractical and you are almost guaranteed to spill water over yourself sooner or later and then you will stop using it for that purpose. Just do 100 pushups, 100 situps, 100 squats and a 10 mile run every day and you won't even need to hit the gym. Without a frying pan you won't even be able to prepare enough protein rich meat and so you won't see any benefit from weightlifting. 

Survival
I reiterate that you need food to survive. You cannot live on coffee and sex alone, as much as PRO wants it to be true. What are you going to make with your kettle? Instant noodles and coffe? That will get boring and unhealthy real quick, and don't expect to pull any hotties or retain any wives with that menu. 


Dildo
PRO does not respond to the criticism that a huge majority of people would not ever want to use a dildo. If you are a straight male and you own a dildo then that is useless to you. Your wife will have her own dildo if she wants to use one, there is no usefullness of having another one that the man in the house owns. If you have a hot chick over and you pull out your own dildo to use on her then you are definately going to creep her out and ruin the entire evening. PRO says to stick it up your own ass but that is gay. PRO also says that the dildo will allow you to retain the interest of your wife despite having a micropenis. Since RM does not offer any sources for this claim I can only assume that he is talking from personal experience.

Dangers
PRO mentions STDs but he does not substantiate the claim that having a dildo is going to prevent you from getting one. That would be a condom which is not the same. Furthermore, using the dildo the way that PRO describes, using it on yourself and others during the same session and on multiple partners that is actually very dangerous [nhs]. PRO complains about the process of cleaning a frying pan but to avoid chlamydia syphilis herpes bacterial vaginosis shigella hepatitis B hepatitis C HIV and AIDS you will need to wash it thoroughly every time you drag it out before you stick it in again. Plus there are many dangers even if you do your best because any scratches you fail to detect will allow bacteria to hide from the boiled water and give you the aformentioned diseases. Furthermore, many bacteria survive the cleaning process and stick around for 24 hours to infect you next session. Vibrating dildos are even worse because they contain bateris and you cannot just dump them in boiling water each time. There are also numerous way to harm yourself physically while using a dildo. 
Scientists in the United States are warning that most sex toys on the market haven't been properly assessed for health risks, even though the materials they contain are potentially toxic and strictly regulated among kids toys. All these sex toys were found to contain phthalates; a group of widely used chemicals that can be detrimental to human health. At high enough concentrations, they are known to damage the liver, kidneys, lungs, and even the reproductive system. [sciencealert]
 So not only are dildos not reducing any health risks as PRO was trying to imply, but to the contrary,  they strongly increase chances of serius harm in various ways. 
Round 3
RationalMadman's avatar
RationalMadman
Pro
#5

 there is no way kettle+dildo is better than kettle+dildo+frying pan+kitchen knife+cash+expanded job opportunities
I want to discuss the potential of one schoolbook.

The scope of debate is 1 of each. Con hasn't stated which school book, or which school, grade nor expertise it applies to.

In fact over 80% of the stuff Con insists I haven't replied to comes down to scope alone. We are talking about 1 of each item only. Not all of them and one of every variety. Furthermore, we are talking about across all situations what is usually better not what niche scenario Con can come up with to make them better nor me myself.

We are of course both using examples to highlight how they're better, that's not what I'm saying can't be done. You have to explain why consistently across many scenarios, 1 of your pair of items is usually better than the other. To get the kind of benefits from 1 school book that Con is alluding to, you'd have to be at least having 3, why 3? Because it has to at least be enough to get majority for a qualification or alternatively be enough to cover every subtopic of a major topic which generally would only be done by 3. That's also only if those 3 book applies so well to the specific career you end up with. Con keeps talking like 1 school book opens all these doors for all schoolchildren to later achieve well in life but 1 school book is all you have, in this debate. You have 1 out of all of the textbooks or whatever variety of school book you can imagine. You have one only.

Con is unironically using 4 seconds on repeat of this 45 second magazine-esque news video to back up the entire claim that you can wield a frying pan that's big enough to cook well in fast and powerful enough to fight off invaders. I intentionally didn't go into the video in Round 2 to both save characters and hope Con got the hint. This old man did not swing that pan fast, he did swing it powerful. The video is slightly slow motion I admit that but even if you speed it up (which you can do with YT) that speed will 0%, not even 1%, 0% work against any home invader or whatever variety of attacker unless they're rather slow themselves. You're swinging in such an obvious way.

I wanted to fundamentally refuse to use gimmicky videos as evidence but I want to show you something.

I admit very few videos explore using a kettle because firstly hammers etc are way better (offense is the best defense ethos) and a pot is superior to both a kettle and a frying pan if we talk defensive style home weapon due to the combination of the lid and the fact that it works one-handed much better.

You will notice that the man in the video Con shows had to use both his arms to even begin to swing that powerfully with the frying pan. You can with one arm do a lot with a kettle. If it's a stove-kettle and you have a towel at hand or it's got a decent handle-protection on it, they often are metal meaning they themselves heat up making it a hot weapon to hit with on top of itself.

Now, usually you are not defending a home invasion but both debaters agree it's a factor in this albeit as a minority part of what 'usually' consists of.

What instead is much more useful is eating and exercising towards being healthy enough to handle said fight and daily activities as well.

I did not bring this up earlier as this is not part of my constructive but there is something called a kettlebell in resistance training:

This of course is not identical to an actual kettle, you grip it differently because the handle of a kettle has to be held sideways for it to be safe to not release water (unless it has a super secure lid that lets you hold it horizontally like that). My point is that the concept of resistance training with an object shaped like a kettle that weighs something beyond 'easy to swing around' is a genuine thing thatis incorporated with the kettlebell concept. All freeweights are loosely based on motions that a bell-ringer had to do, that's why they end in 'bell' but the kettle bell is more resembling of a 'teapot without the spout' (which is fundamentally what a kettle's shape is based on) and there is pretty much no denying that if it comes to handling a home invasion you'd need to be fit.

On the topic of health, we have the dildo and STDs. I did not say you need a dildo to not get STI/D I talked 'usually better'. You can even get a third of STIs from kissing itself btw, however you really think during oral most people are wearing the condoms? Genital-to-mouth can spread STI/D and that's the biggest method it actually spreads because most people don't realise it.

^ a source in case you don't believe so many STIs spread through oral sex.

My opponent will probably double down on this in the final Round saying to increase sex education and have a happy sex-active adolescence but my point was the dildo is miscategorised as an adult-only taboo toy. It actually would be a much more useful idea to make masturbation itself far less taboo, especially for females, since then the deep urge to have sex for the sake of sex is at least reduced on teenage girls.

This assumes no guys enjoy exploring the receiving anal. That's obviously not true and I decline such assumption as pegging and gay sex are of course 'things' that enough guys enjoy it for it to matter on this topic. There is no survey I can find that combines pegging enthusiasts with gay men statistics where only the 'bottoms' or 'vers that receive anal' are measured. I also think many lie on such surveys meaning the pegging one, nowhere near enough pegging enthusiasts actually proudly offer themselves up for such surveys because they're embarassed, it's more shamed than gay sex these days in the West.

When we talk about what's usually better, we have to consider versatility. One kettle and one dildo are extremely versatile and reusable with cleaning both being as easy as... cleaning. They help cook, disinfect and enjoy a much easier-to-handle sex life for any situation with a single woman or low-libido-male-partner-of-woman, not to mention tiny dick man.

It's very important to understand that the frying pan and school book are terribe in versatility and easy-reusability. Not only is cleaning a frying pan far more cumbersome to handle, even using it to heat things itself involves 'spit' juggling amounts of oil where too much and too little is a constant shifting thing and the heat too. You have one school book not multiple.

Thanks for reading voters, please take your kettle make a tea/coffee, grab your dildo and enjoy voting on this debate.
Benjamin's avatar
Benjamin
Con
#6
Thank you for the debate RationalMadman.

Scope
PRO is arguing that having 1 book is not enough but that is not the point. He claimed himself that the scope is based on what is usual and normal. And in 99% of cases, having a school book means you have received, are receiving or planning to receive an education. To have a school book but no education is extremely rare. Almost everyone with a school book are going through life as educated people, which is an incredible advantage. But having a kettle and dildo does not imply any such advantages. 

Probability of being educated given (school book) >>>>>>>>>>>>> Probability of being educated given (kettle and dildo) but (no school book) 

So people with a school book are on average way more educated than people with just kettles and dildos. The work opportunities alone are more valuable than any two household items. 


Frying pan

Cooking
PRO does not dispute that the frying pan allows you to create a variety of delicious dishes. He claimed the frying pan is unable to boil water, but it can actually be used that way.

Self defense
This is an important argument since PRO himself argued this as a benefit of kettles. He has failed to refute that even old man can swing a large frying pan with one hand hard and fast enough to fend of a charging crocodile. PRO does not even dispute that weapons experts and street fighters have proven the frying pan to be an excellent weapon. 

Training
PRO simultaniously claims that a frying pan is to heavy to swing around, and that the kettle is better for training. This makes no sense. A heavy frying pan would be great for training.

Cleaning
PRO claims it is hard to clean a frying pan but that is absurd. Its as easy as scrubbing it with some soap. 


Kettle

Self defense
PRO claims that it is a good weapon for self defense but could not find a single example of kettle self defense. That is because everyone prefers the frying pan over the kettle in a pinch. 

Training
You cannot use a kettle as a kettlebell since you will just spill water all over you. Plus you are not supposed to angle it that way and put that much stress on the handle, it will break.

Cleaning
PRO claims the kettle is easy to clean and that you don't even need to do so. My sources demonstrate the opposite being true. Frequent cleaning is both crucial and quite complicated.

Food
You cannot live just on drinks and sex. The kettle owner wont be able to prepare protein rich dishes, and thus will struggle to even survive and definately wont be able to put on muscle. 


School book

Monetary value
PRO does not dispute that a single school book is worth potentially more than 100 dollars. Anyone with a school book can sell it and buy a kettle and a dildo, and now have 3 items + cash.

Education
By the standard of "what is usually the case" that PRO himself embrased, we know that having only one school book means you have already finished your education and are working on selling your books, or are just starting and have yet to buy the other ones you need. The case where you have only one school book and therefore will not be educated is literally the type of "niche scenario [one] can come up with" that PRO condems as falling outside the scope of the debate. 


Dildo

Limitations
PRO totally ignores my argument that females will have their own dildos if they want to use one during sex and that there is no need for the guy to also bring along his own dildo. 

Benefits
PRO claims that dildoes reduce teenage sex rates and improves family cohesion. He also said that having a dildo will help you keep your wife from leaving or cheating even if you have a micropenis. Even when asked, PRO provided or no evidence or supporting arguments for any of these claims, so voters are obligated to discard his assertions as mere conjecture. 

Cleaning
The process of disinfecting a dildo is cumbersome and must be repeated ad nauseum during sex. So when you drag it out of the hole you will have to start the kettle, wait 20 minutes, then disinfect it, dry it with a perfectly clean towel, then stick it in again, and repeat the process for every new hole. You also need to store it somewhere 100% sterile.

Harms and dangers
PRO claimed that dildos helped reduce chances of STD. That is not only false, but the opposite of the truth. For the 99% of people who do not perfectly clean the dildo every single time, the chances of getting infected with STDs are dramatically increased. But even if you are vigilant and thorough, there is still a high likelyhood that undetected damaged on the dildo, resilient bacteria or just plain bad luck are going to make it happen anyways. There is also the issue of physical damages which is very common. 


Summary
PRO defines better as "more advantageous", not "most pleasureable", so his case falls apart immidiately. The value of education and physical training far outweighs any pleasure that can be obtained by kettle and dildo. The school book means you are going to live your life as an educated person, and the frying pan allows you the ability to cook protein rich meat that you will need to grow a healthy and strong body. The kettle and dildo will not enable you to eat healthy and have a succesfull career. Instead of that, PRO wants us to live as broke coffeine and sex addicts.

If you can sell a school book and buy both a kettle and a dildo with the money you gain, which you definately can, then the school book and frying pan combination can be switched for frying pan AND dildo + kettle, which is definitely better than JUST kettle + dildo. PRO has not even tried to dispute this most crucial argument, so voters cannot in good faith vote PRO. 


Conclusion
My items are way better than PRO's items. But even if you think the resolution is true, PRO has made a terrible case with numerous lies and inconsistencies he failed to correct.

RM does not deserve a vote this time.

Vote CON!