Career or love-relationship

Author: 24_AMANVI

Posts

Total: 30
24_AMANVI
24_AMANVI's avatar
Debates: 0
Posts: 4
0
0
0
24_AMANVI's avatar
24_AMANVI
0
0
0
For a serious person and for a serious relationship, is it normal to prioritise career over relationship. Just because for more better life in future together. And how the limits can be defined for relationship for both the partners when are on the path of the better career and the goals are yet achieve. 
Lemming
Lemming's avatar
Debates: 7
Posts: 3,354
4
4
10
Lemming's avatar
Lemming
4
4
10
-->
@24_AMANVI
Depends what you mean by prioritize,

Seems normal enough to 'me, if someone has to work more than they like, be away from home longer than they like at times,
People usually need to work, to make a living.

Even some people gone from months at a time,
Though not 'everyone is willing to trade work for love, even if it will provide benefits in the future.

Personally I'd say it important to talk with one's partner, see what they want, consider options.

Though some couples 'both want to work hard and reap benefits later on.


Years ago, my parents divorced when my Dad changed jobs, against my Mother's ultimatum that if he 'did, she'd divorce him,
There were other things too, just a straw on a camels back.

ILikePie5
ILikePie5's avatar
Debates: 3
Posts: 15,167
3
7
10
ILikePie5's avatar
ILikePie5
3
7
10
-->
@24_AMANVI
I think prioritization is key on an event by event basis
24_AMANVI
24_AMANVI's avatar
Debates: 0
Posts: 4
0
0
0
24_AMANVI's avatar
24_AMANVI
0
0
0
-->
@Lemming
But also we believe the life is quite unpredictable. So will it be right to do if both the partners are agreeing to incline towards work more and to enjoy life together in future . Also everyone tries to avoid having any kind of regrets in future 
Lemming
Lemming's avatar
Debates: 7
Posts: 3,354
4
4
10
Lemming's avatar
Lemming
4
4
10
-->
@24_AMANVI
If both partners are inclined towards work yet still enjoying life together, it doesn't seem bad to me.

Money has a certain amount of value in life, though I think eventually it's value ends up as diminishing returns, once one is well off, one is well off,
There comes a time to reap the harvest and enjoy life,

Though I think people can make the mistake of doing that too early in life,
People who drink 'all the time and leave heavy tips even when poor, eat out all the time, buy expensive cars, boats, but that's all off topic.

Again, I don't think it's bad to work,
Maybe just don't forget each other's initial goals though, don't forget each other, don't work so much you 'never have time for each other.

I speak broadly, as I'm unsure what the details of your life and work are.
RationalMadman
RationalMadman's avatar
Debates: 574
Posts: 19,931
10
11
11
RationalMadman's avatar
RationalMadman
10
11
11
Career first but only until the ball is rolling and reliable. I learned in life that barely any woman loves and respects a man who hasnt properly got his career going.

It makes you bitter at first the sheer hypocrisy of women that call men superficial but eventually you can sit and ask yourself what is the point of being bitter.

Get a career, let the love come later, it is just the fucking way the dating world works. The woman you end up with will be great and probably will admit she would never have dated the broke you. So fucking what, it is the same idea as saying you would not have dated her had she been uglier or less healthy in both a physical and mental sense.

Women need stability in a partner, are you gonna be a stable minimum wage earner? Is that really your end goal?

I do not write this stuff much at all here, it sounds sexist and looks down on underachievers. I was an underachiever, my life involved toxic attitudes and events that made me a lazy pathetic gamma male that kept blaming others for my downfalls.

I learned how to become more alpha and sigma like and bit by bit hope to get a life that I am truly proud of, not just living through.

Do not drop everything for love, especially not as a man. She will dump you because not only of the financial strain but your whole fucking attitude of feeling like a dependent loser will seep into the interactions. It hurt me to admit it, it hurts me to type this but money fucking matters, men are fundamentally providers and we cannot keep fighting the genetic interwoven gender tendencies and preferences.

If you want love as a heterosexual man, first worry about having any kind of career. Trust me, women can smell 'winner' on you and they go for it. It is not about lust, it is about life.

As for women, still put your career first, you never want to be genuinely dependent on your partner and you live in the best era in history to avoid ending up that way.

Have something reliable, have something to answer when you get asked 'so what do you do for a living?' There is no amount of wit or charisma that can counteract 'I am a NEET or in a deadend job with no real prospects to it.' 
zedvictor4
zedvictor4's avatar
Debates: 22
Posts: 12,074
3
3
6
zedvictor4's avatar
zedvictor4
3
3
6
-->
@24_AMANVI
If one and ones prospective partner are astute, then it should easily be possible to combine both a career and a relationship.


zedvictor4
zedvictor4's avatar
Debates: 22
Posts: 12,074
3
3
6
zedvictor4's avatar
zedvictor4
3
3
6
-->
@RationalMadman
Love is what?

Was it ever any more than an internal response to an external stimulus?

Slowly corrupted by the human propensity to overthink.

Surely if  we possessed an actual instinctive love for an unrelated adult, then it would override the developed necessities of career and social success..


Romantic love is baloney really isn't it?


What love attempts to describe are specific internal electro-chemical processes, relative to sensory messaging.
24_AMANVI
24_AMANVI's avatar
Debates: 0
Posts: 4
0
0
0
24_AMANVI's avatar
24_AMANVI
0
0
0
-->
@RationalMadman
I partly agree to what you are trying to say. 

But i couldn't agree with you when u said < man are providers > . I believe for both the partners the main priority should be the career and ofc they both need money to get settled and fulfill their " DREAMS " and the dreams for all couples can vary for which this doesn't matter who is the provider . They both should be earning as per their satisfactions , how much they want from their life . 

If we take an example , a man is following his career he loves and he he is quite satisfied with his career and what he is earning and can fulfill all his dreams and he expects this much only from his life and if his woman is earning more , she have different goals , different wishlist , in that case whom u will call the provider ? 

So i don't think for partners only one person is a provider. It's one's choice if he / she wants struggle to earn more for their loved one but can't call anyone  ' a provider ' . 
RationalMadman
RationalMadman's avatar
Debates: 574
Posts: 19,931
10
11
11
RationalMadman's avatar
RationalMadman
10
11
11
-->
@24_AMANVI
I didn't say she can't earn more.

It doesn't matter who is dominant, if you break that dynamic you have an unhappy couple, I don't give a fuck about political correctness.

Masculine people provide, so a masc woman and fem man can have a woman provider. It isn't about paying bills, it's about a role, a flow.

She needs to associate you with provided resources and comfort. If you think I'm bullshitting, stay bluepilled. I don't care. Women can befriend, they can fuck and they can enjoy company of underemployed men without much of a future to them but they will ditch you and move on for a more confident man who knows he's going somewhere. It's what it fucking is. You can call it sexist, I call it redpill realist.

It's the same idea as saying a guy will leave a woman who stops nurturing his sexual, emotional and social needs well. The more she nurtures, the more of a secure hold she has on him in the relationship. Women don't exactly want that, they have their girlfriends to cry to and be social with, the sexual needs are there and needed but what she really wants is a man to be her rock. She wants a man that no matter what the fuck happens, is there, secure and calm, headstrong and calculating. She wants to be led, however the leader she wants has to have the life that backs up his confidence and swagger.

I am not interested in this discussion, I won't debate it. I don't care what anyone says, my life taught it to be true. In Lesbian couples both are seeking a provider and stabiliser in the other, whereas in gay couples both are seeking a nurterer and fun lover.

The only countercase is trans people and I refer you to my masc vs fem division in severe cases.
24_AMANVI
24_AMANVI's avatar
Debates: 0
Posts: 4
0
0
0
24_AMANVI's avatar
24_AMANVI
0
0
0
-->
@RationalMadman
Okay , i misunderstood you here . But glad that i pointed that atleast not ending up thinking wrong of your post in any sense . 

I definitely agree to it !
sadolite
sadolite's avatar
Debates: 0
Posts: 3,171
3
2
4
sadolite's avatar
sadolite
3
2
4
The meal ticket always come first in my opinion. Watch how fast a woman will leave you if you don't put bread on the table.

10 days later

PREZ-HILTON
PREZ-HILTON's avatar
Debates: 18
Posts: 2,806
3
4
9
PREZ-HILTON's avatar
PREZ-HILTON
3
4
9
This is simple. Men should continue to prioritize their career, and women should prioritize family. 

Men love killing themselves to be providers by working 80 hour weeks for large checks.
zedvictor4
zedvictor4's avatar
Debates: 22
Posts: 12,074
3
3
6
zedvictor4's avatar
zedvictor4
3
3
6
-->
@PREZ-HILTON
That's sure how it used to be.

Then women got big ideas.

Fortunately for the species this is not yet a global phenomenon.

A much more pleasant way to take over the world, just out produce the opposition.
PREZ-HILTON
PREZ-HILTON's avatar
Debates: 18
Posts: 2,806
3
4
9
PREZ-HILTON's avatar
PREZ-HILTON
3
4
9
I don't blame women who want to pursue big things. They really shouldn't be jealous of men who ruin every other aspect of their life because of their drive to be providers 
Intelligence_06
Intelligence_06's avatar
Debates: 172
Posts: 3,946
5
8
11
Intelligence_06's avatar
Intelligence_06
5
8
11
-->
@PREZ-HILTON
This is simple. Men should continue to prioritize their career, and women should prioritize family. 

Men love killing themselves to be providers by working 80 hour weeks for large checks.
This right here lol. You are using a flaw in the capitalist system as the basis for a stereotype concerning 50% of the population. 

PREZ-HILTON
PREZ-HILTON's avatar
Debates: 18
Posts: 2,806
3
4
9
PREZ-HILTON's avatar
PREZ-HILTON
3
4
9
-->
@Intelligence_06
This right here lol. You are using a flaw in the capitalist system as the basis for a stereotype concerning 50% of the population. 
I don't think any civilization is immune from having some workaholics and status seeking individuals.

Men like pussy and women love giving pussy to people with power money and status. So capitalist or not, men are going to do the things that get them pussy. 
RationalMadman
RationalMadman's avatar
Debates: 574
Posts: 19,931
10
11
11
RationalMadman's avatar
RationalMadman
10
11
11
-->
@PREZ-HILTON
One of the few times I will overall agree with you, though you do love to exaggerate things to their 'absolute' depiction.
zedvictor4
zedvictor4's avatar
Debates: 22
Posts: 12,074
3
3
6
zedvictor4's avatar
zedvictor4
3
3
6
-->
@Intelligence_06
I would suggest that 50% of the population is actually self-stereotyping relative to it's internal function and processes.

Modern social aspirations and expectations compel certain groups to strive to exceed their innate nature.

Though this is currently not a global evolutionary shift.

The future impact of this shift on the species and specific national sub-groups will eventually out though.

Factory farming would be a reasonable alternative if the current trend of defeminisation, demasculinisation and sexual equalising persists.
Vici
Vici's avatar
Debates: 11
Posts: 333
2
4
7
Vici's avatar
Vici
2
4
7
OBVIOUSLY, it's is career. If you are rich, then the women will flock you. no one wants a poor bum
PREZ-HILTON
PREZ-HILTON's avatar
Debates: 18
Posts: 2,806
3
4
9
PREZ-HILTON's avatar
PREZ-HILTON
3
4
9
-->
@Vici
I am broke 40 and getting fat, and honestly I don't have a problem getting quality women to sleep with me. I get in relationships with mentally ill ones, but I have a lot of options sexually. I am also only 5ft 6in . 

Granted getting laid isn't as easy as it was when I was 20, but women will fuck poor fags like me. The whole alpha fucks beta bucks mantra is true. 
Deb-8-a-bull
Deb-8-a-bull's avatar
Debates: 0
Posts: 3,205
3
2
3
Deb-8-a-bull's avatar
Deb-8-a-bull
3
2
3
-->
@PREZ-HILTON
Have you noticed  like a quite significant rise in cockold material?  

Whan i was 18   there wasn't a chance in hell of anyone fuking my girlfriend. 
Now however. 
If you are " stuck" wylted. 
i am quite happy to have you come around and do the missus.   
Its just a thought. PM me.  

Your porn  " category selection  " has changed hey ?

When you are 18. It is ( HOT TEENS / CHEERLEADERS And an occasional,  ( Do the babysitter. )  
40 it is  ( Fuck my wife /  Sloppy seconds and Creampies. 


Deb-8-a-bull
Deb-8-a-bull's avatar
Debates: 0
Posts: 3,205
3
2
3
Deb-8-a-bull's avatar
Deb-8-a-bull
3
2
3
Hey wtf
Opps. 
Did i just post that out loud ? 

That darn cat of mine has gotten on my keyboard again,  
 Sorry guys. 
Deb-8-a-bull
Deb-8-a-bull's avatar
Debates: 0
Posts: 3,205
3
2
3
Deb-8-a-bull's avatar
Deb-8-a-bull
3
2
3
No but, I am sure my wife would like me talkinig about her like that to others. 

Soooooo. 
Back soon. 
Deb-8-a-bull
Deb-8-a-bull's avatar
Debates: 0
Posts: 3,205
3
2
3
Deb-8-a-bull's avatar
Deb-8-a-bull
3
2
3
Now someone type . 
Are you going to teach her a lesson?   

Then elaborate more.  

Real fuckin cute like. 
Yeah 
HOLD.  


Deb-8-a-bull
Deb-8-a-bull's avatar
Debates: 0
Posts: 3,205
3
2
3
Deb-8-a-bull's avatar
Deb-8-a-bull
3
2
3
Seven going on eight minutes have passed with not one reply. 
Rude much ?

It is almost  starting to feel like you guys think you are to good to do my wife. 

I'll give it another 10 mins.   
Intelligence_06
Intelligence_06's avatar
Debates: 172
Posts: 3,946
5
8
11
Intelligence_06's avatar
Intelligence_06
5
8
11
-->
@Vici
OBVIOUSLY, it's is career. If you are rich, then the women will flock you. no one wants a poor bum
I really want to think you are being ironic here. Your choice can be justified but this is basically as far from a precise justification as I have seen ever on this site.

If the women flock to you because you are rich, then the ends is that you want to get women, not money. You are not rich enough in that case if you think you are choosing career. In fact, if you are rich enough that all you care about is exploiting not just the men but the women and the children as well and crave the feeling of being a class enemy at the same time boasting the fact an uprising can't stop you from being richer, that is what "choosing career" is if you are trying to be rich. Some people work to be rich and attractive but once they get stable influx of female friends they just stay there at a few millions. You can go beyond. Billions. Dozens of billions. To the point where no one wants to go anywhere closer to you other than in your obligatory speeches, not even the women and the children.

You are choosing relationship, not career.

Polytheist-Witch
Polytheist-Witch's avatar
Debates: 1
Posts: 4,188
3
3
6
Polytheist-Witch's avatar
Polytheist-Witch
3
3
6
Again it's hysterical to sit here and watch men make decisions about their life based on what they think a woman would think instead of just asking a woman what she thinks. The fact that men think all the women on the planet share one brain and think exactly the same is not only sexist but it's misogynist and it's why the patriarchy is f****** ridiculous. And let's be honest men are completely lazy if you don't give them a paycheck for what they're doing. Because none of them work and then come home and work they expect their wives to work a job and then come home and still do all the vagina duties. Cooking, cleaning,  laundry and sex. It's very rare you find a man willing to stay home and do all that, raise the kids and let you go work. Most of the time if a man isn't working he just sits on his ass and still expects you to do everything.
Vici
Vici's avatar
Debates: 11
Posts: 333
2
4
7
Vici's avatar
Vici
2
4
7
-->
@Intelligence_06
OBVIOUSLY, it's is career. If you are rich, then the women will flock you. no one wants a poor bum
I really want to think you are being ironic here. Your choice can be justified but this is basically as far from a precise justification as I have seen ever on this site.
I'm dead serious here. If you are rich, then women will want you. 

If the women flock to you because you are rich, then the ends is that you want to get women, not money.
No I am saying that you can get the best of both worlds. Theo choice is "career or women", because if you choose women on its own whilst neglecting career, you will be a manwhore who gets the bottom of the heircahy women, but if you are rich, you get money power and the women will come to you. Money should always be first 


PREZ-HILTON
PREZ-HILTON's avatar
Debates: 18
Posts: 2,806
3
4
9
PREZ-HILTON's avatar
PREZ-HILTON
3
4
9
-->
@Deb-8-a-bull
i am quite happy to have you come around and do the missus.   
I appreciate that. It is fun to be submissive to women, but unfortunately they never respect you afterwards, so I would advise against it