RM endorses Airmax again!

Author: Mikal

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#151
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Mikal had 3 rounds, you have mistaken his round 2 for his round 1 but actually your depiction is fair enough except you don't get what my 'pray' related to.
I didn't count the first because it was before you agreed to battle him, and it was considerably shorter than the rest.

I also think that you don't know how to 'read' what I write in raps if you think my flow is off but you're biased so 'insults' will be 11/10 for Mikal to you
Yeah it would be really interesting to hear how some of your lines were verbalized IRL. I tried to repeat some of them mentally while playing the rhythm in the background, they didn't really work. It could be an accent thing too, so I will be fair with that. European pronunciation maybe makes it sound different? I still fail to see it, but if I am being fair that's the only thing I can think may come into it. Anyways I am sure you would call me bias regardless, but I did try to give you credit on things you did well in the rap and there were parts I really liked, and insults you did do really well on. 


#152
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I will give you an example and also I wrote it so that if you had a typical American accent it rhymes and reads well:

[You want me teeth-baring,] lax moderation? [Let's go fragile Mikky, I'll make you] beg to end this war.
bold and italics = slow and loud

[] = rapid

without any = medium pace
#153
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I will give you an example and also I wrote it so that if you had a typical American accent it rhymes and reads well:

[You want me teeth-baring,] lax moderation? [Let's go fragile Mikky, I'll make you] beg to end this war.
bold and italics = slow and loud

[] = rapid

without any = medium pace
Can you link a youtube video with this style of pacing used? For some reason even still it doesn't sound similar to anything I've heard. I am trying to make it make sense with the beat in my head. 
#154
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Well many rappers do that at times but one who consistently 'whips' his flow is Tech N9ne:


In this rap he does from the get-go.
#155
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In the video you posted, the lyrics are posted in the description. Going over them and listening to them, I am not noticing similarities with your syntax and his. Even the sentences where it is arguably run on, there are rhyme beats placed mid sentence t hat make it flow easier. Here are some examples of the tech n9ne song you listed.

"Bitter we givers and they keep my figures, don't try to n*gger me" A longer sentence, but the rythym bounces off the rhyme three times at a perfect pace throughout the line such that it sound fine when listening to it.

"Suckas hated now they crawlin’ back cause I’m tall as Shaq and I’m always up for brawlin’ bats." Sounds perfect listening to it because rhymes are placed very well.

Now let's go to your rap:

"Crying to the website to lend you money, lucky your girlfriend didn't have to change from a slut into a whore, You want me teeth-baring, lax moderation? Let's go fragile Mikky, I'll make you beg to end this war." 

The rhymes here are spaced out much more dis-proportionately than anything tech n9ne did in that song. No matter how many times I try to spin this one mentally it keeps falling flat, coming off as a rant more than a clever rhyme scheme. 

"You think you're shit here anymore just because Airmax takes the throne and you're what? The white knight cucked by him, I bet when you post the vote-counts your underwear is soaking,"

This one seems to be completely lacking a rhyme, but I guess based on pronunciation you can make an argument for the two bolded parts rhyming. Even if I were to buy that, the placement of the rhymes are so odd. And the whole first sentence is unneccesary to the rhyme scheme, and doesn't have a place at all. The previous two lines "voting" , "gloating" barely rhyme with soaking as is, but are now so far back away from the the rhyme that it doesn't sound good at all.

"So, do I get a little ego boost out of it? Perhaps, but let's go back in a time in a machine, and let this hasten..."

One I did give you credit on is this:

"I will break you into fucking pieces, ego, rep and trust me, this pandora's box you've opened is a side of me you'll fight and flee from, filthy rodent," The rhymes aren't the best but I can at least kind of hear what you are going for in this one with trying to imitate a tech n9ne flow, even if it still kind of misses the mark. 
#156
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 throne 'n'  rhymes with soaking

as for the part you are not sure how to flow let me show you how the flow/internal-rhyming happens:

you're what? The white knight cucked by him, I bet when you post the vote-counts your underwear is

the underlines are momentary rhymes to please the eardrum while the 'what cucked and und' are there to be subtley consistent but it does depend on taste.

Somebody like eminem does that a lot.


#157
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throne 'n'  rhymes with soaking

as for the part you are not sure how to flow let me show you how the flow/internal-rhyming happens:

you're what? The white knight cucked by him, I bet when you post the vote-counts your underwear is

the underlines are momentary rhymes to please the eardrum while the 'what cucked and und' are there to be subtley consistent but it does depend on taste.

Somebody like eminem does that a lot.
So even if I give you that those are rhymes, kind of a stretch, but pronunciation could give you the benefit of the doubt here, I find that you use run on rhymes far too frequently. That would be my revised criticism here. I will give you that maybe if I heard this in a video rap battle it might sound better to the ear than it does reading it. I think you focus so much on the content of the rap, and getting out what you want to say, that you often stray to the side of getting it out, instead of phrasing it cleverly. The true key to rap battle is being able to say a lot with less, and making it clever. Mikal did this far better, and I think you could have made some of these rhymes work if you spent more time constructing them differently.

I could give a pass overall if it was just done like once or twice, but I felt anytime you got the flow back on track for a second, one of these run on lines were randomly introduced in the middle and it disrupted the flow. 

Despite our other forum arguments however I do try to be an unbiased judge, whether you think I am being truthful here or not is your perrogative. But can I ask you, if you were to critique your own rap what would you say? Or did you think you did a flawless job here?