Men, do you agree that women are always right?

Author: MarkWebberFan2

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#31
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@3RU7AL
...i've always been in a position where i pretty much pay for 100% of everything

but of course, that doesn't keep my partner from making ridiculous demands

it's important to "stand-up-for-yourself" sometimes, but not always

try to "pick-your-battles"

I don’t know your arrangement with your partner, but I wouldn’t comply with a toxic partner if they “make ridiculous demands”. My exes once downplayed me for the trivial fact that other people have “moved on to better things". That wasn’t the only insult, because they had also lied in their arguments about things that were trendy, and basically say that friends had looked down on us. Although I have my own reservations about their claims, let’s just say that I do not accept social trends as valid compromises.

You and Wylted have the same advice, but I’m very reluctant to assert my ground right now because I truly believe finding a partner is difficult than what others may think. It is even more difficult to find one that treats you well. My GF rarely changes her mind, and she doesn’t want me to “self-improve” like my previous exes. She wants no evolution whatsoever. i need that stability after family had constantly cited Muhammad and Allah’s curses on me. She is also very open to romance, even though she seems soulless a lot of the times (lol). I think her touch for decor is better than mine even though her friends had looked down on her style sometimes. She doesn’t seem to care, and that is also a plus to me. Her being rebellious is a good thing.

I think it’s an issue of whether she’s willing to let go of her original arrangements, and while I understand moving things around can annoy her, I also need them. But I can’t really blame her. It is annoying waking up at night and finding that I had placed our cups elsewhere. I know it’s trivial to fight over things like misplaced receipts or moved utensils, but she needs her routine just as much as I need mine. Perhaps there’s a way i can leverage Wylted’s reward system and your advice to stand ground on things that really matter. I will give these further thought.



#32
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@MarkWebberFan2
that sounds intelligent
#33
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@MarkWebberFan2
In all seriousness.

We loose sight of the fact, that the base reality of a relationship is not housework and decor. 

Though nest building is certainly a part of the process.

What you describe is a perfect example of natural role play.

Though the evolved human condition allows us to overthink, question and modify the situation.






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#34
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@zedvictor4
Well, I suppose there's good reason for that. A spouse that barely compliments or involves you in her life is probably not someone that you'd want to marry. Unless of course it's exactly the kind of relationship that you'd want. But all bets are off when one partner starts complaining.

...natural role play...evolved human condition
Overthinking might just be a way to experience that sort of emotion (roleplay/condition), because prophets have made verses out of it. For instance, Muhammad had preached islam nonviolently in his early life, until kafirs questioned and bullied him openly. That led Muhammad to forge a series of hatred verses, most of which have allowed muslims to see themselves as "rightful bearers" of truth. Anyway, I think there is nothing really weird about emotion. It's just a way of channeling a person's insecurities.

#35
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@MarkWebberFan2
The base reality of human emotion, including Islam, is survival and sex.

Everything else is just an elaborate game.

The product of overthink.

Though overthink also facilitates the development of matter beyond the normal scope of universal evolution.

What it all means and whether or not there is a greater purpose to it all is the big question.

I tend to think that there might be.
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#36
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@zedvictor4
Crimes have been committed under the influence of emotions. Muhammad clearly felt humiliated when people turned on him. When kafir fortresses resiliently stood and exchanged supplies under the cover of night, he justified his future war booties by revealing more verses. Plus, a significant portion of the Quran is dedicated to the eventual punishment of the kafirs, and their final defeat at the hands of muslims. I wouldn't call that a game of survival and sex. He clearly felt slighted and wanted more of what previous prophets have inherited. He was a major power even after he was poisoned, and his wives instigated wars long after his death.

There are limits to felt emotions. If Muhammad had seen a baby succumbing to rabies, he would've had a different turn of events. He would've preached to find a cure rather than justify a list of reasons to slay Kafirs.
#37
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@MarkWebberFan2
As I stated everything else is an elaborate game.

Survival and sex are base instincts.

Muhammad was just another charismatic bloke who enjoyed sex, lived for 60 years or so and then died.

And a crime is one assumption based upon another.

Good game.

Clever stupid gene as ever.

And currently there is Donald Trump, amongst others.


94 days later

#38
Lemming
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No, I don't think women are always right, or that a husband should bend over backwards to make her glow all the time.

Then again, such 'can be the expectation in some cultures,
And I don't mean specifically nations, , , The cultures of nations change all the time, or have various regions with different expectations.
. .
Even individual families in a town or individual people might have expectations.
Also depends on the situation.

Personally if I got involved in a relationship, I would think it right for both individuals in a relationship to consider each other's feelings, motivations, situation, stressors, wants, and so on.
And 'each bend a bit perhaps,
But everyone has different ideas of what moments and property should be bent or not.

Some people like privacy and breathing space without the other person 'considering them all the time,
Or dislike having to spend 'too much consideration on another person.
. . .

When I was a kid, living with my Dad was annoying, as he preferred not to have regular chores in the house, and to let dishes and dirt pile up, until at random days he would burst into a cleaning frenzy, and be grumpy and pushy about making everyone engage in a cleaning frenzy with him.

Recently when I visited my Dad, again he had a 'lot of expectations on how everything was to be in his house,
I can stand 'some expectations softly put, but he's very. . . OCD about it, causes friction, and since there's friction and irritating commanding, begins to feel like one is in a power play, and one's will becomes even more misaligned and muleheaded since one is an adult now.
I just did as he wanted, since I was just visiting, but it'd be 'really annoying as a permanent situation, to the point that if I were ever to live with him, I wouldn't, rather rent a separate house.
. . .

In the military when I had barracks roommates,
It was usually both of us keeping to our own spaces, doing equal amounts of work cleaning, keeping room clean, not being too loud.

Except for two roommates I had,
One who complained about my being awake on my computer at night, Which too bad for him, I was working the night shift, and didn't feel like changing my sleep schedule on my days off. Or being exiled from my room for 12 hours on my day off.
So he was always grumpy while we were roommates, but bah to him, I think I was 'already nice by using headphones and leaving the lights off.
. . .

I own my own dishes, utensils, few cooking implements.
So I can just store them my way, clean them my way.
#39
ebuc
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@MarkWebberFan2
Woman { X  x } is manager ---embracement---   of time.
....think of gravity embracing time pulling all that surrounds her under large dress or umbrella of consideration....

Man { X y } is time. ----narrow focusability more often than woman in general--.
...think of EMRadiation { photon } as time.....can be focused in aligment as a laser to cut through steel etc...


7 days later

#40
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@MarkWebberFan2
I agree with Wylted. Women respect and are attracted to males that push back and hold firm. It's a sign of security in the mate. The trick is to compromise a few times to make her unsure. For weird biological reasons, women enjoy chaos and being on the edge sometimes. Probably has a lot to do with fluctuating female hormone levels. So don't be a total dick but also don't be a wuss. Be mostly a dick.
Topic's author
#41
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@Greyparrot
@ebuc
That's one way of looking at Wylted's advice. Well, my GF does have an active mind and she's often more mindful of things even if she's rebellious to her friends. I guess her active mind needs some sort of a reciprocating force, if that makes sense. Maybe being a dick will add new variety to our relationship.

I will try a proper give and take based on this. I've only ever succeeded in romance, but I should pay attention to other things outside of it. Thank you.
#42
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@MarkWebberFan2
Via cristo ...... woman > https://www.flickr.com/photos/uxeta/44874432 < man


'Men are pushers, women attracters '...Bucky Fuller
~~~
Women { attractor/contractive/spread are more likened to a geodesic field }and  manage the male { radiative/expansive/focused as localized field aka quanta }. and the their progeny.

Woman > inherited designed for cooperative family/village life ..(   )(   )(   )(   )....

Man > inherently designed for  support self > family/ village life.../\/\/\/\/\/\...
~~~~~~
..."7 Differrences Between Male and Female Brains....

....In one of the largest functional brain imaging studies ever, Amen Clinics compared the brain SPECT scans of 46,034 female and male brains. SPECT is a brain imaging technology that looks at blood flow and activity patterns. This study, which appeared in the Journal of Alzheimer’s Disease, revealed fascinating differences between the female and male brains. In 70 of those regions, female brains showed significantly more activity than male brains.

...Overall, women have much busier brains compared with men. In problem-solving, women tend to harness several areas of the brain while men rely on a more localized effort. ....

#43
DavidAZZ
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@MarkWebberFan2
I'm late to the game, but Wltyed about has it down.  Women don't respect men who give in to the whims of their wives.  Husbands need to have a vision of the future and the wife needs to mold into that vision, not the other way around.  It brings security to the woman and along with that, respect for her man.

I've been married 20 years and the best thing I can state about a successful marriage is to respect the other person.  When one always just tramples the other's views or thoughts, then it becomes hard to talk about anything.  GP mentions to be a dick most of the time, I think the term "dick" is not the correct term.  She will resent you for just being harsh.  Be firm and not condescending.  Listen to her wants and then make a decision based on the information given for the vision you have, NOT based on her wants.

Also, there is the fact that some people are just to immature to be in a relationship so if she was used to throwing a fit to get her way, then it may be time for some tough love.

Anyways, my two cents. . .