What is the closest you came to suicide

I want to hear stories of when people almost killed themselves. It is only happened once for me though I have fantasized About it dozens of times. I'll share if somebody else does.

Me and Groucho  Marx are the same. Maybe he was after a laugh, but I seriously do not want to belong to any club that would have me as a member. If you love me, it says a lot about how big of a piece of shit you are.

I have tried and failed several times. Luckily I failed.I am a coward. I don't want to be.

Well I mean the fact you failed when it is so easy to succeed shows it was likely just a cry for help. Most people really trying succeed on their first attempt. Anyway, can you share one of those times? Can you tell me about that experience. The thoughts? The attempt itself? The aftwr effects? What lead up to it?

Too much anxiety and depression. I can't stop worrying about things. Once I took a bottle of sleeping pills when I was drunk. I just ended up puking a lot and sleeping all day. I've done this twice so I probably ducked up my kidneys or liver or something. 

"Too much anxiety and depression. I can't stop worrying about things."

That seems to be a theme around here. Do you ruminate when you are depressed? What are you thinking of? 

Please ignore everything wylted is saying here. It is fantastic that you lived, do not listen to his toxic mentality, he gets away with it because people blame insanity for what is strategic bullying.

I think bullying is wrong, even when RM does it. He is a lot like elliot Rodger, the narcissistic tendencies the distorted thinking, dividibg the world i to two abstract groups. The bullies and the victims. Regardless of whether he sees you as a bully or victim it is offensive. You are either evil or a weakling. I encourage him to get a grasp on the distorted thinking before he does end up on a shooting spree. Ruining his life and taking several people down with him. He is the exact personality of similar people who have engaged in mass shootings. I hope for his sake and the sake of his potential victims, he seeks help

^ Example of the bullying.

If any other member talked about a member in this way bsh1 would discipline them. Wylted says "I believe it, omg I am helping everyone saved from RM" and can call me a fucking maniac who would shoot schoolchildren" and get away with it.

Fucking disgusting.

Example of somebody with an abstract concept of bullying who just looks to villianize things he doesn't like. Nothing I said was untrue and I strongly encourage psychological help. Not because I am trying to lavel you as disturbed but because I think you would ve helped and society would ve helped by avoiding another elliot rodger scenario

This is literally the very reason that defamation laws were made IRL, shame that online you can talk such utter shit about me and get away with feeling you have helped me instead of hurt me.

In time, as the Internet and laws regarding it evolve, you will not be able to talk such utter shit about me without repercussions. I am not a piece of shit who would murder innocent children like that. You know very little about me or the world, you fucking pseudo-psychoanalyst.

You have no ideal what you are capable of if you continue taking the same path elliot Rodger did. Maybe you end up with the same results maybe not. He was not a bad person for having dark thoughts he was bad for letting them develop in the way he did to continue to live in his head. We are all capable of murder, which is why we should guard our sanity. I have to manage my manic periods because delusional thoughts could cause me to murder people. I am not a bad person for acknowledging this threat and working to solve it. You are not a bad person if you recognize your similarity to elliot rodfers and seek help early.

You have run around this website unironically spreading pro-suicide, pro-terrorism and pro-school-shooting agenda.

You get away with it because we all know you're the insane one who labels everyone who notices it as insane. You're the one projecting, you're the one with special leniency just for you. You would be 100% sued and permabanned if I was head mod. You would not be able to do the shit you're doing.

I do not give a single shit what you label me as Wylted, you are a delusional paranoid schizophrenic trying to label me as someone with a worse disorder as a result of your own distorting reality. I can play your game if you want, I will do it politely, accurate and better. You are a delusional paranoid bully who is having special rule-leniency for him and only him who then assumes any opposing you are actually the ones having it for them even IRL.

Yes, I agree you would not do that. You represent the early part of the path Elliot Rodger took. I like how you say you would not kill innocent children. Perhaps you are closer to carrying out the crime than I thought. You think atleast half the population is not innocent and even less are children. So now we know your targets.

Thay is fucked up. I'm against school shootings. 

Wylted I think you are in dire need of attention to distract you from your distress. Instead of spending time on here you should get out of the house and try to socialize with real people who can make you feel better.

I don't know how being more social would help. Wouldn't socializing with people also just be a way to distract from my distress? Besides that, it doesn't matter what I do. The distress is always there. Right in the front of my mind. One part of me will socialize, the other would be above the situation, looking in. Thinking how pointless it all is. Thinking of the meaninglessness of the interaction. 

Being social is more than just meaningless banter. It's a means to express yourself. Most importantly, and at bottom, it's about love. Love is the core essence of wellbeing and meaning.

Aren't you the dude who made a "menage a trois" with two Colombians? You must be thiniking how to bang more chicks and not how to die.

Il Diavolo

The last one I had was with 2 white chicks. I usually keep it white. 

It wasnt you, then. My bad.

Not very close, even tho I went through the mental and physical processe of thinking I might to do that to myself.

Sitting naked in a field far from interstate with a shaving razor blade, and just nicked my wrist a little bit, and then thought about what the resultants would be.

Bloody mess.

Then maybe my ego kicked-in saying, well who would ever know what happened to me and that would be a little unfair to them.

Actually, once before that, after a drug induced pyschosis where I put my ciggerrate out in my friends mothers choclate bx cake. I finally awoke at dawn and took walk on city street outside and thought I had done bad thing and mayb e I should kill myself.

Then later on I realized that, my friends parents and my parents were serious alchoholics and what I had done was not nearly as bad or as bad as some of their drunken stupors.

If you live long enough you start gathering some good stories about your own drunken stupidness. That is assuming you drink now and then.

Many years under the belt and a few very dumb/stupid things I did. Just lucky no severe harm to myself or others.

Only been drunk twice. At 15, I was usher at wedding where my brother was best man. At reception I had bee, wine and champagne.

My mother on way home ---also drunk--- hit curb, tire blew out, we pulled over and I got out and puked. Then I changed the tire.

Did not drink again until 21 - 23 and at a friends bar-reasaruant I drank 6 - 8 pints of Isabel Ros'e and line them on top of the bar, and told friend dont worry I have a cast iron stomach, then went out to paarking lot and puked, and came back in a apoligised.

Did not drink again for nearly 25 years, and then gradually got into occasion one 5% hard lemonade{ wine coolers } on hot days on way home from work.

Recently I went off 6 pack of Mikes hard lemonade 5%  for 4 months, then my wife brought home some off-brand orange flavored wine cooler, and now had a 6 pack last three weeks each. No biggie.

Life is good, except when its bad. Going on Carribean cruise soon so then only have to deal with guilt of Cruise ships have 3 times carbon footprint greater than if we take a jet plane vacation. 

Scared of cruise ships. So many deaths happen and rapes. No official statistics but everyobe working in the industry knows the numbers are huge. I wouldn't feel guilt, just fear.

I was unaware of Noro virus until now. Damn it. The carbon footprint thing doesn't bother me though. I think the global warming stuff is a but over blown and not much we can do about it anyway. Everytime we create laws here to stop it, there goes another competitive advantage to businesses in China who we can export our carbon footprint to, so we can shrug our shoulders and say "well, we did our part". 

The fiance wants me to go on a cruise also. No ideal why, even people on vacation annoy men they always act superior to their servers and I am always the one in a group trying to make amends by kissing the ass of servers and layong large tips.