So your argument is that they want to be treated like white people are, but they don't want white people to be treated that way
no, they want to be treated like white people. Full stop. They aren't saying they want white people to be treated badly. They are saying they want to be treated well. The problem is that how white people are treated is directly related to how they are treated. For example, a white person is more likely to be hired for a job than a black person even if they are equally qualified. If the black person was treated equally, then the white person wouldn't have an advantage in being hired. So by treating black people equally, white people would lose their advantage, and that could been seen as being treated worse.
so you're basically admitting it's about changing which group is oppressed and which is privileged rather than equality.
no, I am not saying that at all.
It's true that there is a disproportionate number of whites who are wealthier and shit, but there are also whites who aren't. The privilege is "rich privilege" and not "white privilege".
It seems like you are trying to use specific examples instead of looking at trends. It's like saying that I rode my bicycle without hitting my head, so it must be safe to do so. But in order to actually look at the issue, you have to look at the broader trends. How many people hit their head and get injuries etc. You only want to skim the surface of the issue. If you want to look at real "white privilage" you would look at how black people are much more likely to be charged with a crime than a white person who took the same action. How a black person is much more likely to be sentenced harshly for the same crime. How black people are much more likely to be denied access to a rental property based on their race (trump's company was found guilty of doing this). How white people are much more likely to be hired than a black person with the same skills. I can go on and on. The issue is systemic and found across all levels of society.
Most people nowadays don't think whites are superior or deserve better treatment
This is fundamentally untrue. And you only have to look at statistics to see it is untrue. People may not consciously decide to treat white people better, but they do.
The biggest privileged/oppressed dynamic is gender/sex imo rather than race. Women are treated way better than men and just have it way easier in every way.
It's astounding to me than white men can play the victim this hard. They have literally all the benefits. They make more money than all other groups. They have an easier time getting hired than any other group. That have the vast majority of political and financial power. But they love crying about how downtrodden they are. I always find it hilarious. And the funniest part is that the people crying about it the hardest are usually the ones who think they are an "alpha male".