Not pooping in the dormitory & 5 ways of disproving one's opponent

Author: Intelligence_06

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The following is to be considered as a joke but nevertheless actually happened for some reason.

Background

Okay, so you know I am a pretty marginal figure in school, and the people who live with me at the dorms pretty much stronger than me in every way except maybe the usage of logical thinking. They have decided that I cannot poop in the school dorms even if they are asleep because "it smells bad". When I sneak into the bathroom at about 11:00 PM, the guy who proposed it suddenly woke up and stopped me. When I kept deciding on that I should have the freedom of pooping in the dormitory, he kicked me near the nuts. It was at this moment that I think that this guy is equivalent to a wall titan in intelligence and reasoning with him means nearly nothing.

Other than a few discussions in Chinese Language Arts class(I am in a school in China in which I cannot get access to freeflow forms of communication with the outside from Mon-Fri usually), I rarely engage in logical thinking during the weeks. It was at this moment that my logical thinking awakened. Immediately I read "The Inevitable" by KK(Because a normal one will always keep the eyes on somethings they would not have -- Internet) and suddenly came up with 5 approaches to prove why I should be able to poop in there.

The person is to be called T as no personal information of anyone should be leaked here.

These are to be agreed on as these are basically true and I can confirm that what I am saying is true:
  • By that time, I have gone a full 4 days without pooping, which is considered unhealthy according to medical standards[1]
  • The sleeping sector of a dorm room is separated from the bathroom sector via a door
  • I have pooped in the same dorm room for at least 10 times before this occurrence, with T being here not minding it at all
  • T and other people have pooped in the same location with no one minding it
  • There is a toilet in the bathroom but not a urinal
  • No other places have allowed me to poop there
  • The original proposition is to be phrased as "The person known as Intel_06 must not defecate within this room" while we were sleeping on our dorm beds
Method 1: Moral Kritik

This is the most obvious one on this list, as generally nobody likes being stripped of doing something they would consider normal to do in their everyday life. a middle-class teenager who can go to their home and play PUBG every night in his family's 2-storey house with 2 bathrooms shouldn't be restricted to do such a thing. The syllogism should be paraphrased as:

  • It is generally established that pooping is a normal thing that everyone does and should be able to do at a toilet
  • T has restricted me from pooping in a toilet
  • Therefore, T has restricted me from doing a normal exercise of normal people.

  • Stripping the rights of someone doing a normal exercise is selfish and has violated that someone's personal rights, and that is immoral
  • T has done so
  • Therefore, T is selfish, has violated my personal rights, and he is to be considered as immoral.
More will come next, do not post yet.

Intelligence_06
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Method 2: Semantical Kritik

As someone who has attempted of winning all possible debates with semantical wordplays and loopholes(and often has failed to do so), this shouldn't be unexpected from me. I am ME, after all.

Note that it is pre-assumed that the bathroom is separated from the sleeping section:
The sleeping sector of a dorm room is separated from the bathroom sector via a door
And the proposition is established while within the sleeping section:
The original proposition is to be phrased as "The person known as Intel_06 must not defecate within this room" while we were sleeping on our dorm beds
So the bathroom is NOT "THIS" room when being talked about from said perspective.

The syllogism should be:

  • The Bathroom and "this" room are different rooms
  • T only limited me pooping in "this" room
  • Therefore, he has only limited me in pooping in the sleeping room, but not in the bathroom.
Method 3: Onto Opp's way of thinking and doing

It is pre-assumed that I have pooped in this bathroom with T being near while not minding.
I have pooped in the same dorm room for at least 10 times before this occurrence, with T being here not minding it at all
Therefore:

  • I have pooped in the same dorm room for at least 10 times before this occurrence, with T being here not minding it at all
  • However, T has limited me for doing the SAME action this time, which is inconsistent
  • Therefore, that would make his logical construct inconsistent.
What is more, is that he(and others) have pooped in this room also with no one minding it:
T and other people have pooped in the same location with no one minding it
  • T has done the same thing and has limited me from doing the same thing
  • That is inconsistent
  • Therefore, T's logical construct is inconsistent
Method 4: Onto the Conditions

It is self explanatory. There is a toilet here.
There is a toilet in the bathroom but not a urinal
Here it goes.
  • A toilet is specifically placed here to do the specific occupation that I need to do
  • T has limited me from doing the thing that a device placed is specifically designed to do
  • In conclusion, that makes T anti-utilitarian as he limited the usage of a thing that is specifically made to be used(Also, others have used it before)

  • As that things are to be used or otherwise they won't be there(there would be a urinal instead if so), being anti-utilitarian is incorrect today
  • T is being anti-utilitarian
  • Therefore, T is incorrect on this issue

Method 5: Factually proving what is to be proven

This is boring, but after remembering that I have consulted a health expert for all questions that me and my family would have regarding our body as a whole, it is established that not pooping for 4 days is unhealthy. Facts agree with me[1].

Therefore:
  • It is healthy for me to poop once a day
  • I have not yet pooped in the past day
  • Therefore, it is healthy for me to poop now(especially there is a toilet here for this reason)

  • It is healthier for me to poop now than to not, and it is only possible here
  • T has limited me from doing so
  • Therefore, T is wrong in the terms of health, or factually incorrect.
Conclusion
  • T is proven to be wrong about this issue
  • People who are proven to be wrong about issues no longer have a an influence on if the present actions on this issue is good or not
  • Therefore, I should be free to decide if I should be able to poop here.
That is it.

Thank you for reading all these bullshit. I hope you have enjoyed your day and this chunk of text have not ruined it.

Lemming
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@Intelligence_06
Sounds irritating.
Though looking at a situation different ways 'can be helpful in coping.
FLRW
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Because this is a health issue, why don't you take this up with a college counselor?
Intelligence_06
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@FLRW
Because I am not built like other kids.

So simply when I started thinking, it is already 11PM and it is unrealistic for me to specifically go to another place to poop.

Yes, I eventually did the thing in the school building. The main thing is not whether I pooped or not. It is the logic I have gotten from it.

The kids(such as T) can go as long as 1 week without. It is not like not doing it for 1 week damages me too much or anything. However, once a day is just superior in terms of health.
RationalMadman
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Ask when/where you can poop and do it in that place during that time.

Eat more fiber so that you're more able to shit on command in order to not need to shit at a later time when it's inconvenient for the dorm-mates.

High-fiber excrement also stinks less excluding animals like cows that ferment it, it's why carnivores' shit, such as that of dogs, stinks the worst.

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@Intelligence_06
Hang in there, buddy.  One day all of your bullies will look to you for instruction and advice.