Thett walked out of Camp David in a daze. He strode past Mueller, who was saying something to him,but none of the words went through. Thett knew Kanye was a powerful man, but he had not expected to feel so lowly in comparison. Moreover, he had not expected the highly critical information he thought he was delivering to simply be apart of the plan--a plan in which he was even less than a pawn.
As he exited the premises, he decided that he was done. He was going home. Pulling out his iPhone, he summoned an Uber to drive him to his castle, which like Camp David,was in the woods of Maryland. On the ride he went back to contemplating his journey. It had truly felt like his life had all led up to this moment, like a narrative in which saving his beloved country from the Russians was the final act. And Kanye had shot it all down. On top of that, Thett knew he was under indictment for violating selectively enforced federal regulations and would likely be arrested as soon the government realized that he was still alive--more collateral damage in Kanye's master plan. He couldn't help but feel bitter after everything he had done...
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September, 2001. A post 9/11 meeting between President George W. Bush and Pat Buchanan changed the course of history. Buchanan convinced Bush that the neoconservative policies of his predecessors had caused this disaster, and as a result of this revelation the President had vowed to reorient his administration to serve right wing populist ends. Determining that trade with China was undermining industries critical to national security, Bush cancelled a free trade agreement. China objected, stating that this violated the NAP, and threatened the use of military force to defeat the dangerous nonsense of protectionism. Bush didn't back down, and on December 7th, 2001, 60 years after Pearl Harbor, the Trade War began, which Bush promised would be "good and easy to win."
Thett, then a senior at DDO High School (along with Bsh1 and YYW), was drafted into the US Navy. Thett had always dreamed of being a pirate, and in the Navy his job was to storm Chinese trade vessels and seize their products. It was just like being a pirate, and Thett had a grand time during the war, which unfortunately couldn't be said about everyone else. The Trade War was a disaster, as an unexpected Chinese naval victory crippled the US Navy and left the ground forces to fight a land war in Asia without resupply. President Bush immediately resigned and his Vice President, Airmax1227, successfully negotiated an end to the hostilities and the return of free trade. This disaster is what led to the libertarian atmosphere of the current day.
After the war hordes of bitter veterans unable to find a job, many of whom were still enamored with the ideology of protectionism, took to the seas and continued pirating Chinese trade vessels. The US governments failure to rein them in was a continuous source of tension, but under Airmax's libertarian policies, the military budget was slashed to the bone.
Meanwhile, Thett took his savings from his meagre military salary and got rich as a day trader. He won his start up cash by accidentally borrowing twenty three million dollars from his brokerage and investing it in highly risky options and then selling at the only moment that day when it would've been profitable. He posted about the incident on Reddit to try to understand what had happened (https://old.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/7w6cq0/i_somehow_made_110k_this_morning_and_im_still_not/), but forgot to change up his investments, so the same thing happened the next day only with far more money. Suddenly, he was wealthy beyond his wildest dreams, and he leveraged this wealth into celebrity status becoming a rich and eccentric playboy. A brief career in the CIA led to a brief career in politics, followed by a much longer career in business. Thett ran a trust busting enterprise. Whenever a company like Amazon or Google got too big, Thett would create an alternative and use his star power to go after them.
Still, this didn't satisfy him. One day, at Ron Paul 2008 meeting, Thett had a revelation. Since the free market was ALWAYS best, it alone could solve the pirate issue. After the top regulatory mind in the world (Bsh1) took a look at the plan, the Thett3 Privateering Company was born. Thett hired a crew composed of high school friends and military buddies, with the plan to fight the pirates in exchange for pay and soon enough shipping companies were clamoring to hire them out for protection. Eventually Thett's fame culminated in the biggest honor of his life: a cameo appearance for him and his crew on the Spongebob Squarepants movie (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohMzC_1W0ZY)
Thett had met kings and queens, presidents and dictators, had fought men and beasts. But it was all over now. His crew was dead. He was broke. And because he violated federal regulations, he was now a fugitive from the law.
