It appears that jesus souley died for, HOT CROSS BUNS.

Author: Deb-8-a-bull

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#1
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Hot crossed buns 
Orrrrrrr. HCB. 
Let us now give a moment silence for the " apparent "  selfless sacrifice the Jesus did for us allllllllll so we can all enjoy these tasty little beauties. 

What jesus did.
And What jesus had to do to bring us alll HCB

Its bloody divine right. 
And its umm, intervention.  

He had to be well  known.
He had to except to die from being nailed to a cross
and he was to do this in his 30s .
Truly horrible  right ?

But thats the exact  recipe for making. 
HOT CROSSED BUNS.

I mean. One wrong ingredients we would have nothing

He cokd of been battered to death.  
This however does not lead to,   HCB
Battared buns wont sell
Or like.
He could of been stabbed. 
But there aint no celebratory  Knife slit Buns  also knon as,  kSB

Jesus dying , then there and the how   =   HCB. 

Thiis being the only one true thing we CAN allll receive from jesus , because of his death. 

TIS THE ONLY BENEFIT TRUE FROM JESUS.

Give me one  thing you can direct ummm, jesus to for giving us. 

YOU wouldn't cut your life short for a type of bread roll to be named in conjunction with a few hundred years later would ya ?

Its fucking gangster like right .
Dying for a fashioned bun to be maid in your honour. 
What it is bitches.
What it is. 


Hey if there was a scripture in the bible that said / alluded to . 
Not being allowed to have quadruple butter on ya HCB. 
Would you abide.?
HELLĹLLLL NOOOOOO

Every time i partake in a HCB ,
i picture God looking down on me givig me a big thums up.
Im soooooooòo religious. 

You'd have to think that , if you eat around 100 HCB's over ya life span.
Your pretty much guaranteed a place in heaven.     
Im sure i woukd have eaten around 100.


So um yeah


▪°•▪°•▪°•▪°•▪°•▪°•▪°•▪°•▪°•        HOT     CROSS     BUNS.     ▪•°▪•°▪•°▪•°▪•°▪•°▪•°▪•°▪•°▪•°

Pick ya self up a half a dozen this weekend. 
And Praise Jesus .   

Now i shouldn't have to remind you guys this.
It should go without saying
But Please guys  .
Please Make sure ya get the Atheist friendly ones if your a atheist. 
The last thing you want to be doing on easter is making a trip to the emergency ward all because you forgot to ask for the atheist friendly ones. 
Ive been There before. 


SO yeah. 

▪°○⊙°▪○°▪⊙○°▪○°        THANK  YOU  JESUS .       ▪°○•⊙▪°○•⊙▪°○•⊙
Thanks for the buns. 


 


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@Deb-8-a-bull
And chocolate eggs.


I think that we discussed buns and eggs last year.
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@zedvictor4
I thought The chocolate eggs was a pagin thing like holloween and Christmas  

Im having trouble thinking jesus is solely responsible for chocolate eggs.

Jesus wouldn't  have a bunny rabbit deliver them would he. 
Thats staight up silly .
Its not even true Zed. 
Thats The Easter bunny.
His not really real . 

Giv me a sec. 
Before i feel foolish.

'  Google  '  is ther easter bunny real. ?
Reading. 
Reading. 

His not zed.
The bunny dude ain't  real. 
HANG ON A SEC...
reading. 
Reading.
Yeah like i thought ,  NOT REAL.

Bunnys don't come from chocolate eggs.

They dont make chocolate eggs 
Norrr.   Do they deliver chocolate eggs. 

Talk me throug the way you've connected jesus and his death haveing something to do with us receiving chocolate eggs. 
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My wife says I have HOT BUNS!
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When I think of Jesus dying on a cross my dick gets hard.

Ira Kora. Dea invicta.
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Put a fucken cross on em,  and the sell like hot cakes.

Jesus life and death was umm. " Responsible " for the sale of large numbers of  Crucifix pendants.  Along with necklaces.  

So um yeah ,
we THANK  the Jesus. 

What else have we got now because of jesus. ?  

Oh i know..

THANKS JESUS FOR . Body of christ flave waffers. 
Body of christ.  
Body of christ. 

Ya couldn't make body of christ flave waffers without Christs body. 
Nope. 

Ive done the math on Jesus  hight and wweight and overall flavoring to guesstimate 
How many waffers can be flavored by one body .
And well 
Its safe to say that ,
there is no way that any waffer can and Jesus flavor it what so evrer. 

Unless 
Unkess.
He was put through  a good quality industrial  juicer . 
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@FLRW
Send pics.....
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How much is Shila paying you?
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One a penny 
Two a penny
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@Deb-8-a-bull
Yep Deb, I'll walk you through it, step by step.


It's all basically pagan, sex and Sun worship.

But the Christians couldn't be bothered to pick their own days, like October 24th or August 9th or February 11th, so randomly had parties that loosely coincided with pagan sex parties.

So pagan egg day sort of coincides with a sin martyr death type Christian thing.

And then a clever bloke came along and firstly invented chocolate and secondly came up with a brilliant promotional idea.

Let's make chocolate eggs and market them for all the new sin martyr cross death devotees, and get some babes to dress up as naughty little bunnies.

So bunnies were symbolic of sinners and eggs representative of female sin and Cadbury cream eggs representative of gooey jizz and fertilization.

And so, not to be left out, the artisan baking industry came up with buns.

Buns speak for themselves and + marks the spot, but Christians had other ideas.

Though Christians are generally hypocrites and also enjoy missionary, doggy, anal and creamy jizz.

And as the Bible tells us, Jesus preferred man on man action.

And as we also know, apostle comes from the Greek word apostellein, meaning to "send forth" the word of God into the mouths of thy brothers.

So you see Deb it's all to do with the Sun and devotional  sex, which is why the Spanish invented sangria and package holidays on the Costa del Sol.

And why women like anointing things with olive oil and eating the forbidden fruit...Especially each other's.

I'm only guessing that olive oil would also have been Jesus's lubricant of choice.


And Halloween was just an out and out pagan dressing up in sexy spooky outfits, sex party evening.

And then along came Christians who pinched the idea and turned it into all saints day and trick or treat evening....Meaning that all the sex parties had to postponed until after the Christians and children had gone to bed.

I think that explains everything Deb.

Though just ask if you need clarification.
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@zedvictor4
It always comes back to SEX hey Z

No bu You market the choc eggs. 

I gonna sell,
(  necklace with cross pendent  )
Nothing says your a christian more the cross on necklace.

And for a low price of $29.99. Thats  For silver. 
$49.50 for the gold. 

Ill put you down Zed for 1 silver and 2 gold. 
And you can have them for $100 neat $100.

What about a range of ummm. Beads.
You basic rosemary for $18. 50.
Anal for $ 13. 75

Ill put ya down for a pack of each. 

Oh and ZEE
Hey Zed. 

Thank you for shopping at  ( ________.       _____.    _________. )
Yet to be announced.  

Your Tracking number.    SUCKER. 

Your receipt number is.    23854628864872569858299835727

ENTER CODE :  DIP SHIT 6
For a free pack of beads of your choice. 

Sooooooo , thats another pack or the  Anal ones.
Nice choice zed.
Nice choice . 
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SO yeah. 

▪°○⊙°▪○°▪⊙○°▪○°        THANK  YOU  JESUS .       ▪°○•⊙▪°○•⊙▪°○•⊙
Thanks for the buns. 
Your buns are marked unknown with a cross. So it says in your profile, “unknown”.
#13
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@Shila
"unknown"

Me or Deb.

Both men of mystery.

And ask nicely, and you'll get 1/2500th of a fish to go with your 1/1000th of a bun.

Yum Yum.
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@zedvictor4
Me or Deb.

Both men of mystery.

And ask nicely, and you'll get 1/2500th of a fish to go with your 1/1000th of a bun.

Yum Yum.
Is that how you share your buns?
#15
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Me and Jesus.
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#16
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I did me 2 buns today.
Thank you .
Thanks.
I bite into em and umm, i feel like me and Jesus are fucking  good mates.
Anddddd.
I  100%  know how  much he appreciates it.

HEY This friday i aint going to eat meat. 
I PROMISE. 

DID EVERYONE HEAR THAT. 
I GONNA OBSERVE BLACK MOTHER FUCKING FRIDAY.
 

Now Of course it's only commen sense that there ain't no such thing as a God ..
Buttttttttt.
I play along sometimes.  

Hey Ze.d , you fucking know thjs hey.
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆     I TOO LIKE TO LIVE DANGEROUSLY.   ☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

I like living dange hey. 
Tell em. 

Yeah but nah. 
No eaty meaty for the WHOLE. ▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪     24 HOURS.  ••••••••

Thats a wole day,  Zee.
No pies. 
No ummm spaghetti  bog.
No lasagne,  tacos. 
No fucking umm , maccas burgers.  
Hot dogs you ask  ?
Thats a big Negative.  
No dogs ,
no sausage rolls .
No fucking meat. 
God better ummm respect me for doig this

HE MARKS IT DOWN RIGHT. ?
Zed.
Like um.   
⊙○⊙○⊙⊙⊙⊙⊙⊙⊙○     PARTICIPATED  IN THE 2025  BLACK FRIDAY. NO MEAT FOR A DAY THING.  ○⊙⊙○⊙⊙⊙○⊙⊙⊙⊙○⊙○⊙

I mean..
⊙○○⊙○⊙⊙○⊙○⊙○   SUCCESSFULLY  Uumm  PARTICIPATED IN THE DONT EAT THE MEAT THING THE CHRISTIANS  DO  ⊙⊙⊙⊙⊙⊙⊙⊙○⊙○⊙○

OH and thats in 2025.
So it'll be like.

○⊙○⊙○☆⊙  DID NOT EAT MEAT FOR  LIKE THE WHOLEEEEEEEEEE DAY FOR THE GOD THING 2025. ...○⊙○⊙○
Your welcome , come again. 

God better mark me the fuck down or else shit is going to start

Anyway.
I'll pretty much be turning Christian for a day.
Then. 
Back to athei the next morn. 
Like fucking Swip swap. 

But um . I'm not even asking for a sponsor or anything.



Anyway . 
I'm  currently in training .

You believe i can do it hey. Zed ? 
Yes hey ?

Oh and Absolutely no skippy burgers . 

1 more question zed.
How would i train for not eating meat. ?

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@zedvictor4
Me and Jesus.
You mix your buns with Jesus’s buns? Who crosses them?
#18
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@Deb-8-a-bull
No fucking-meat.


Fucking-meat...I Take it that's a euphemism.

So you ain't eating any Deb

Didn't think for one  mo that you ate meat.

Had you down as a 100% mother fucker.

Black White or Asian.

Pretty sure that Jesus ate meat, Greek types were his fave.

Not much talk of mother fucking.

Other than GOD and his Mum, in the stable when daft Joe was napping.


So Saturday Deb, go try a Greek's sausage...It's what Jesus would have wanted.

You might even fancy sticking your sausage in his hot buns.
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I do like a good snag.    ( sausage  )
 
I just know gods going be looking down at me watching me not eatimg meat. 

Now.
I've  played about 30 or so  good fridays zed. 
And about 6 buns a year for 20 something years.
Add that up right 
carry the 1.

Then Subtract thats time i played wanky wanks with my male neighbor. 
So  thats minus 12. 
Add the one that ya carried  .
and ya  get.
43. 

Now keeping in mind it only takes 65 points to get into heaven . 

I should have sufficient points to enter heaven  when i turn  50, 51.
Sòooooo
I will be quiting hot cross bun and quit  following black friday as from next year and on.
If This can be  achieved,  I should never have to fear ending up in heaven 

Wish me luck . 

Hang on .
Hold the fucking pg
I could stil enjoy my  HCB 's  and all that
And all i have to do
Isssssszzsss  
suck 2 and a half maybe 3 cocks max.

What do i do ?

I'm going to need some time to think this threw.
Ummmmmmmmmm.

Perhaps  One of you guys can come and  lay with me for a few nights.
We can stay up late and play religion forum  together .
 
Just pop ya name down.
Hey Unfortunately  my moms gonna need to ring yours. 
Butttt  it  Will be all good . 
We will have a GREAT TIME..
And help each other out by not ending up in heaven. 

We can eat meat pies and stuff.
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@zedvictor4
You might even fancy sticking your sausage in his hot buns.
It goes against the topic title. “ It appears that Jesus souley died for, HOT CROSS BUNS”.
It was Jesus looking for Hot Cross Buns.
#21
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@Shila
Yep, if I interpreted correctly.
#22
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@Deb-8-a-bull
Hey Deb.


Q.   What do you get if you cross a hot sausage with hot cross buns?

A.   A creamed puff...Yum Yum...A succulent bun oozing with whipped cream.

Q. What do you get if you cross a hot sausage with African buns?

A.  A chocolate eclair...Yum Yum...A shaft of delight coated with sticky chocolate and filled with fresh cream.
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@zedvictor4
Are you looking forward to (  JESUS 'S  DEATH DAY.)

so thats like .
The day Jesus died.

No but Zee.?
Heh Zed.
You are not going to belive what  happens after he dies. 

Lets just say. ,  3 days after he dies 
Well You won't belive what happens .
I let yoju find out. 

Actually i wanna tell ya. 

Zed. 
Ya ready for this.
 Now dont instantly dismiss. 
Ok .

The mutha fucker comes back..
Yep.
What a hoot

?????????.
Like after he dies


???????????
He dies
Then 3 days . He comes back to life
3 fucken days.

Hey Who must they think we are Zed ..?

We. /  you and i know FULL FUCKING  WELL
Thats full fuck well.
   it takes at least 1 month 
I repeat.
At least 1 month for a body to be fully resurrect .
A full rezzy.
.
So you guys telling us Jesus  was FULLY REZZY IN  3 DAYS,
is ,
well i find it insulting. 

May i suggest. 
Ya  Pull  heads in. 
This aint no cattle train.

3 fucking days.

Good game. 
Good game.

Happy holidays Boss. 
And the dear wife . 
■●■●■●■●●■ ♡♡♡♡   ■●■●■●•●■●■●
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@Deb-8-a-bull
???????????
He dies
Then 3 days . He comes back to life
3 fucken days.
Any longer and his body would start rotting.
#25
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@Deb-8-a-bull
Yep. Good story Deb.

Good story.

The alternative ending was...The End.

Not much profit in that though.

And just think, no chocolate eggs, no HCB's and no days off work.

So thanks J.

Enjoy the weekend, Deb and J both.
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@zedvictor4
Yep. Good story Deb.

Good story.

The alternative ending was...The End.
You forgot to post his comment.
Are you looking forward to (  JESUS 'S  DEATH DAY.)

so thats like .
The day Jesus died.

No but Zee.?
Heh Zed.
You are not going to belive what  happens after he dies.

Lets just say. ,  3 days after he dies
Well You won't belive what happens .
I let yoju find out.

Actually i wanna tell ya.

Zed.
Ya ready for this.
Now dont instantly dismiss.
Ok .

The mutha fucker comes back..
Yep.
What a hoot

?????????.
Like after he dies


???????????
He dies
Then 3 days . He comes back to life
3 fucken days.

Hey Who must they think we are Zed ..?

We. /  you and i know FULL FUCKING  WELL
Thats full fuck well.
   it takes at least 1 month
I repeat.
At least 1 month for a body to be fully resurrect .
A full rezzy.
.
So you guys telling us Jesus  was FULLY REZZY IN  3 DAYS,
is ,
well i find it insulting.

May i suggest.
Ya  Pull  heads in.
This aint no cattle train.

3 fucking days.

Good game.
Good game.

#27
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@Shila
You forgot to post his comment.

Thankfully you didn't.
#28
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@zedvictor4
You forgot to post his comment.

Thankfully you didn't.
You don’t read too well.